Hope?

So life goes on, even sometimes when we don’t want it to.  Lately there has been so much talk of death, and gloom and doom.  One of my classmates’ mother passed away last week.  One of my favorites here on OD is going through the loss of her treasured kitty, and also facing the impending death of her mother.  My "family" here in VA is dreading the probable death of the oldest of all the grandchildren to cancer.  Last week I found out about a 34 year old guy in ND who, although he was healthy on the outside, passed away as he put his arm around his wife before going to sleep.  I had to look up who he was, because it seemed to be major headlines for North Dakotans.  Found out he was in tv there, and he was also teh main PR guy for the Medora Musical, which, by my own opinion, is the only real tourist attraction in ND.  So yeah, I guess he was "kinda a big deal" in ND, a true son of the state.  I was talking to Mom about him, and found out he grew up only a few short miles from where I did.  (maybe 3 occupied farms away) 

So yes, it’s easy to understand now some would just want the bad stuff to STOP!  Last October I was laid off from my law firm position which I absolutely LOVED because the law firm went under.  I was very fortunate and found another position quickly, and an independent contracting job for the interim.  This new position is NOT the same as what I was doing before.  Not even close.  I do not love it.  Some days, I don’t even LIKE it.  But I am thankful for it and will stick with it until something better comes along.  I made a promise to myself to stick with it for at least 6 months before I would start actively looking for a different position. 

But, in the middle of all the disturbing curve balls life throws us, sometimes life also throws us a good curve.  When I got home from work last Tuesday, I was sitting playing on the computer, and I received a call from a recruiter I had worked with back in October.  She informed me of a position she had just heard about.  It’s at a small law firm.  She said the pay range is right in where my needs are.  What she said next was what really perked up my ears though.  When she was talking to them, they told her that the candidates skills are important, but more important is the candidate’s personality.  It is very important that the person be very personable, because this firm is a small firm, and everyone is like family.  When she heard that, she immediately thought of me, because she remembered my personality, and really liked me.  (Maybe she was just blowing smoke here, but that’s what she said)  Like I said, this is a small firm, and they haven’t even HAD an IT person up to this point.  So if I am chosen and hired, I will be the only person at this law firm doing IT.  If the firm grows, I would probably have say in who gets hired, etc.  I think this would be an excellent step for my career!  If it is as friendly and enjoyable as they are saying, and I was hired, I would probably stay with them for many many years.  It seems like a job I could really love, like my old job.  I REALLY REALLY miss going to work at a job I love.  At my last job, I worked all the overtime I could possibly work.  At this job, I am turning down overtime every time I am offered it.  Since most of my hours are worked during the weekends when nobody is there, I am able to "tolerate" it.   

I’m not thinking this new job would be a cake walk though!  It is going to be a huge challenge for me!  I’ve always had a "team" to go to if I needed assistance.  I will be the team here.  I will need to continuously keep up and learn the latest and greatest.  I will have to find the resources to resolve any and every issue that comes up.  To be honest, the thought of being the only IT person scares the crap out of me!  But even moreso, it thrills me!!!  I am so excited about it, and I haven’t even been to an interview yet!  I have imagined myself giving two weeks notice at my current job, and it feels so good!  I haven’t been so excited about something since I don’t know when!  Now to just get an interview, and thrill them!  (that’s all there is to it, right? LOL)

I’ve also been looking at prices of rental homes in the area, and will most likely be moving soon.  The "programs" the mortgage company has to "help" me would all raise my payments, either now, or in a year.  If I can’t make the payments now, how is this goig to help me?  Maybe this new bailout from the government would help me by getting my mortgage adjusted to something closer to the value of the home as it is now.  The highest price of a home on my block is about $90,000 lower than what I owe on my house.  That home has been completely remodeled.  Mine is not done yet.  I have been doing my rehab as I had money to do it.  I have not put myself into more debt for it, thank the Lord!  So, yeah, if they take my house, I would probably have more spending cash  be able to save more money anyway, which would help me for a down payment in a couple years on another house. 

I’ve also been going to the chiropractor for a few weeks now, and am happy to report that I have made it a full week now without the "normal" back pain I had grown accustomed to living with.  I’m shocked that without the pain, I have more energy and want to do more.  One of the things I am striving for by going to the chiropractor was to be able to work out and lose all the weight I have gained since quitting smoking.  I haven’t weighed myself since probably September, but then, I think I was 50 pounds more than I was when I quit smoking.  I wasn’t "skinny" even then.  So, yes, I want to lose a minimum of 50 pounds this year.  I’ve looked at the ads for the acai berry and how it can make you lose 30 pounds in a month, and ALMOST ordered some today.  but losing weight that fast just can NOT be healthy.  It just can’t.  I am just going to have to suck it up and WORK at losing the weight.  I konw I’ll have more energy the more I do.  That is the way it works.  I’m okay with that.  If I start truly working at it, I know the weight will come off. 

Anyway, even with all the "gloom and doom" all around me, I am seeing things more clearly, and with more hope than I have in over a year.  Life is continually getting "better" in my eyes.  Yes, life will go on, and as hard as life can be sometimes, I’m looking forward to it!!