Ya had to be there

Man we know this fella who runs the keriokee at this bar we go to every once and awhile…or “frequent” as the kids say, and whenever we go there he sings Hold me closer tiny dancer, but he’ll sing hold me closer Tony Danza. It doesnt sound that funny right? Well bullshit that shit is consistently fuckin funny.

And the girl I am determined to have sex with gave me a christmas card today of a meditating santa. That traslation is pretty clear, I wanna have sex with you too. Shes from Bulgaria though or something. Most unattractive accent ever.

I was walkin in the mall today and these 5 thugs noticed my fuckin dope beard.

“Oh shit, here come da white Jesus.”

tHAT COULDA BEEN HOW jESUS STARTED TOO,. Oh I had the caps lock on back there. Im not gonna push the delete button though. Thats total sellout. So yea maybe people were like, pfff Jesus. And then as his beard got longer they were like damn…he does have a long beard. Perhaps we should listen to what hes saying, Yea they probably did say that actually. I think I kinda remember that form the bible. Im gonna watch TiVo now.