Springfield, Springfield, its a hell of a town

Man I was in this bar last night that was like being in the song Piano Man. It’s so weird I end up getting dragged there about once a month er so and its like a tv show er something. Like theres the guy whos having an affair with that girl and theres the cast from the Prior Lake Players production of Grease and the old couple that are in total love and the one black guy and the enormous indian named lunch who buys tequila for everyone and then wants to pick fights and the old whore and the young whore and the x boyfriends and girlfriends that run into each other over and over cause its a small town that no one can escape.

Its like Thunderdome if the slogan was changed to two men enter, no man leaves. Its like a microcosm of the world being that no one ever leaves this town. The towns like gravity and perspective is like light in that gravity warps light. Ohhhh look at that kid, he was in Grease ya know? Yea, in Prior Fuckin Lake. It kinda like the song NY, NY. If I can make it here then theres no need for me to try to make it anywhere, else. Its like a voulantary East Berlin. A voulantary East Berlin where you drive to the store and see theres a car on blocks in the parking lot. And if you go into the store you see the girl you had a crush on in 4th grade is working as a cashier and you think man what a trip itd be to have sex with her. 20 years from now anthropologists won’t be going to Africa to observe isolated cultures, theyll be coming here.

Ya ever see that show where this out of town guy is driving across country and he drive into this town one night where the sign says " Welcome to Wilmur, Population 27". The only thing for miles is this cafe and he goes in and the whole towns in there eating and drinking coffee and they all stop to look at him. And they wont talk to him or anything and he gets all uncomfortable and goes to leave and the whole town ends up chasing him and then at the end they corner him and hes like "What do you want from me?!?!" And they hold up a cup of coffee. He drinks it and then it shows them all in the cafe eating and drinking coffee and hes there and then it shows the sign and it says "Welcome to Wilmur, Population 28". That was a good show. They should use that as the relocation informational video for Prior Lake. "So youre thinking about moving to Prior Lake. Whats it like living in Prior Lake? Here watch this." Actually a good video would be an old man narrarating "Prior Lake. It’s the remnants of a simpler time. A time where people parked in the middle of the street and said, well fella, I reckon you can go around. The kind of place where eventually everyone starts to look the same and they all look ugly. Where life slows down…to a fucking crawl…that makes your brain bleed."

I’m in hell. Prior lake is the 4th ring of hell.