Shhh Its 4, youll wake up grandmother

>Mannnnnnnnn I lost like $90 on one hand of poker like an hour ago.  I got a king 8, the flop, 2 kings.  So I got 3 kings AND!  Its christmas time, so its a sign.  I raise a little bit, everyone calls or raises a little bit.  Turn, like a 4 comes up, I raise more, everyone stays in, this girl reraises, everyone folds, and Im like awesome, Im taking you for everything.  So we just keep reraising each other and this fuckin bitch has king 10.  Fuckin bitch. 
>Wow I wanna have sex with that girl now.  I wanna have sex with her and then steal my money and leave while shes asleep.  What a smart girl.  I didnt even know they made those. 
>And thats why I can never get married.  Im like a fisherman, like I was at Sun Coast Video to buy a DVD for my girlfriend and Im talkin to the walking around can I help you find anything whore, and they dont have the DVD Im looking for and Im like what would my girlfriend Erin like?  And shes like uhhh how old is she?
>14….Nah Im just kiddin…that was funny though huh.  And it loses something when I write it but I assure you in person its very charming.  So she laughs and the hooks out there always and Oh, a nibble. And I totally got her phone number.  I cant even really help it, the hooks just out there and if it gets nibbled on Im gonna pull back a little and if I get a bite Im reeling that sum bitch in.  And she isnt anything really that special.  She has this long hair glasses smart look which is hot.  In any event I guess what Im saying is I really think I maybe have a real problem and therefore should not be held accountable for my actions.
>If I was rich Id pay everyone on some block to sing and learn choreography.  Then pay one guy to walk up and down the street everyday so at some point someone passing by might stop and ask for directions.  And then the guy starts telling him and starts to sing.  And then other people walking dogs would up and join in.  And before the guy leaves people are coming out of their homes to sing the directions and dance in syncrocy.  And I dont care how happy the song was that would scare the shit out of that guy.<