Mmm Bop!

Man, I was outside smoking in my car today at work, an enormous fuckin crow just lands on the hood, stares at me through the windshield, caws, and then flies off.   That’s good luck, right?  When a crow singles you out and stares into your soul.  That’s a good omen, right?  So great, I’m gonna die of Polio tonight.  Cause that’s the thing with crows.  You only die of old school early American diseases that should never actually end anyones life anymore…typhoid fever, whooping cough, broken leg. …”Dat boy was jussa mine’ing his own business when one of ‘dem big ol’ blackbirds stared him in the eye, grabbed ‘hold of his soul and gave him the mark.  What dun took his life…story goes, late at night, you can still hear him…packing his cigarettes…complainin’ bout da government…”  Fuckin birds.  I’m punching every bird I see in the fucking face from now on.