HAIL SATAN! HAIIIIIL SATAN!

I got a new job. Dope. Kinda fat. Not super fat. Just my new lowered standards fat. Like if you were datin a pudgy midget, and then you started dating a girl with no legs. Its a step up. Or a crawl up I guess. Which reminds me.

Whats the opposite of Christopher Reeves……
Christopher Walken.

Thats fuckin funny. And its ok cause Christopher Reeves is a friend of mine and he was the one who told me it. Know whats pissin me off lately?

….Well…..do ya fucker. People fuckin appologizin fer everything jeeeesus christ. Fuckin pussies, Like moveon.org, they had a contest where anybody could submit a 30 second commercial about Bush, and two of the 13,500 compared Bush to Hitler. And oh jesus all hell broke loose *sob* “we are…..so… *sob* offended…Im sorry Im tearing up a little”, and Move on issued a big we are just so deeply sorry. Fuckin pussies the lot of em. Since fuckin when did how people react to what you say trump what you have a right to say.

My favorite car sticker “I don’t give a fuck if your offended.”

On to the why Im better than you segment….I was up in the cities the other day and drove by the ice palace. Its built across the street from a homeless shelter. Maybe Im incrediably cynical, but expending all that time, energy, and effort to erect (heh, erect) somethin that in two weeks turns into a puddle, while the whole time lookin across the street at the people who hope people dont empty their cats liter box into their garbage so the food will still be edible, seems like mixed up priorities.

See, you wouldnta thought of that. And you wouldnt have expressed it so elequently. And thats why…Im better than you.

I have super glue on my hands.

I think femminists should start callin each other Vagians. FELLOW VAGIANS…hear me know as we march to liberate ourselves from peniaucracy. Fuckin femminists. “I know your a femminist and I think thats adorabel, but this is grown up time and I’m the man.”

Here I wrote a song

I enjoy
Chordaroy

Pfft pfft pfft
Someons coming down the hall
pfft pfft pfft
Fuck you
With your denim
My pants are ill like venom

You think your the big cheese?
suck my fat cheddar
I gots it goin on
with my chord sweater

Pfft pfft pfft
Fuck you

Yea sometimes my chords get holes
and sometimes
well sometimes

You fall in love