January 23, 2006

An idea

Ya know this one time at a party after Joey Ramone died this kid said to no one in particular, "Man I hate the Ramones."

Then after about 10 seconds of no one saying anything about that subject I said, "…What do ya mean ya hate the fuckin Ramones?"

I got into a fight with that kid. Over the Ramones.

I hate the Ramones.

Were I in AA I think Id tell that story first. After everybody was quiet about that story Id say, "I’m sorry, I thought that’d break the ice." Then Id whisper to someone, "Hey, ask me if I meant that figurtively."

Then he’d say, "Soooo….did ya….mean that figurtively?"

Then Id say "Oh no….literally." Then Id break up some ice, put it in a glass, and pour some whiskey. After four glasses I’d whisper to the gu again, "Hey, lets pretend the lead singer from NickelBack is dead. Say the lead singer sucked." Hed say it, we’d fight, I’d get thrown in prison.

Id meet a fella named Toby in there and hed teach me how to smuggle cocaine in to the country. I’d brin in 100 kilos in 7 times and then ask Johnny Depp to do a movie about me too, which he would. Man, itd just be smooth sailing after that

dancing in plastic

January 24, 2006

today i was walking around school on my crutches. Some girl came up to me and asked me what happened to my leg. “A dog bit it off. They had to sew it back on.” I said “REALLY!?” She exclaimed. “Yes. Rabid chihuahuas are very dangerous.” This girl now knows to avoid a rabid chihuahua.

vndttrd

January 25, 2006

my weakness is norris…. and i lobe you…LOBE

Stoone

January 26, 2006

hey doody. ha… doody. what’s a… z-word-whatsit? i fergot the word. SHE’S A WITCH! BURN HER! if you colors were alive and at the salam witch trials, they would get burned for being magical and causing epileptic seizures. OH BURN!

you are a bad child. just figured i’d let you know that send naked pictures.

January 29, 2006

my mom shart on the floor IS THIS YOUR FAULT?

you d.bag. i don’t believe you have a beard. and Carl is in a band so he is way cooler than you.

February 3, 2006

i like my phone. IT HAS A CAMERA. ha. you know what’s a funny word? POOT

February 4, 2006

im so excited about you seeing that video of kids singing that i think i may have sh*t on the coats

i read your note to heather. HAND MOTIONS?!?!? get a new entry. and some new colors, these are effing WHOREndous.

February 7, 2006

youre in my new entry wheres my email?

February 11, 2006

there’s a provocatively dressed lady in an ad on the right side of the screen. she’s telling me Dashboard Confessional ROCKS.