It’s been a while…HODGE PODGE

It has been a while since I have written last. There are many things that have happened and continue to happen as my life is far from quiet.  Sometimes things are just a little to intenese and I can’t process the emotions enough to even write a coherent thought.

Did I write about my job? I can’t remember. It is full time in a pharaceutical company. I went t school to be a medical coder/biller and here i am typing all day long. the dept I work in process invoicecs from the state for the medicaid drugs the pharmacies give to those on medicaid. We type in the invoices and then send them off to be paid. Very repetitous and boring. The pay isn’t bad $16.50 an hour but the hours are long and I am TIRED ALL THE TIME. I work for a temp agency but the company can hire me if they want me. I’m not sure I want them too. It took the longest time for anyone there to actually have a convo with me. for the most part, they pretty much stuck to their clicks and ignored me. Now, some are talking. BUT I still eat lunch alone as no one asks if I want to eat with them…. But I DO get to read in peacce so that’s all good. I started in Jan.

In Feb.,  around Presidents Day we found a 30 pack of beer down the basement where my son (the 18 yr old who was in an accident last yr) now resides. we also found pot. He and hubby got into a fight (I had dumped all the beer down the drain) and he was pissed.  He thinks we should let him drink and smole pot here in the hose where at least he’s safe (his reasoning, not mine). I told him flat out no as I have  2 younger children in the house.  Well the fight continued for a while and then died down, or so I thought. When I was almost alseep it started up again. I heard voices, but not was being said, until I heard this one…."You don’t even care that you almost killed your best friend."  Well, the fight started in earnest. It ended with my son coming up to me crying, kissing me good bye and leaving the house. It was after midnight and was bitter cold outside. By now, I am fully awake and go down to see what ha happened. Our daughter was hysterical crying and says to her father, "WHat kind of person are you, how can you let him leave? He’ll freeze or starve to death." His response…"Shut up or you’ll get punished."  Our 16 yr old son is out there with him trying to talk him into coming back inside. He didn’t. Next thing I know he’s on his way to VA., where the boy who was driving the car and wanted to kill himself was incarcerated in a juve facility. Yes he finally came home, a few days later but to this day, hubby WILL NOT acknowledge that what he said was wrong, he won’t even admit to saying it. Yet we all heard it..

One good thing, Mike has decided to go to college and study engineering.  He will go to Community College to start and then on to a 4 yr. It took until Feb to get his eyes fixed from the accident in July…

Things are the same with hubby and me. He thinks we are doing great, I know we are not. I am NOT happy and dont know if I can stay with my 4 yr plan. On that note, there is a man who wants to have a relationship with me (as in marry) and wants me to get divorced right away. I am beginning to have feelings for him, but I can’t make a decision about this now. He wants to travel and see the world,,,he’s a lawyer and we have so much in common. He wants to marry me and then send me to school  to finish my degree, just because he knows I would enjoy it.. Weird, I know, but for now, I am enjoying his friendship.

We are going back to the shore for a week in June and I can’t wait, I will be alone for a few days and I need to do some serious thinking……..

Hubs and his Mom went to IL to visit his brother that he doesn’t really talk to anymore. They were told that he is getting remarried in Aug. and wants them both to be there and us of course. Hubs said not until his brother apoligizes for some transgrssion and brother refused. So now, we are not going, not that I was anyway, I have my own issues with the slime. Mother in law sais that if Hubs doesn’t go, she wasn’t going either. But since the visit, brother in IL has been working on her very hard and feeding her such a line of bull about this person he’s marrying and now she’s debating about going.  He’s playing her big time, telling her that the girls (his daughters) are so excited and they are going to be a part of the wedding, doing readings and such, so now she wants to go to see them all dressed up.  GAG ME PLEASE!!!!!! He has to work on her, after all how will it look if neither his mother nor his brothers family shows up for the wedding. What would he tell the girls? It’s in his best interest to get her there at least. There is a part of me that thinks that hubs may cave in if his Mom starts the guilt trip on him, but there is NO WAY I will go. My older children also said they never want to see him again either. They lost all respect for him.

I’m sure there;s more I should and could talk about, but now, I’m too tired.

Sorry for the spelling/typo errors, I’m too tored to proof read either,……lol