teh story!

“but…how do you know?” she asked, recent boy-inertia pulling at the corner of her eye. “how can you know when it’s the right person?” i laughed once through my nose and searched for some great philosophical answer to give her, but time-worn and seemingly immutable, there was only one answer to give. “you just do.” i chewed on the words as they stood in the air before me. they needed something else…”your heart finds a peace and…you just know.” no, that still wasn’t enough…but poets have hashed it out for centuries, now, i wasn’t going to solve it at the front desk of a cheesecake factory. she nodded, though, displeased with the cliche but seeing some validity to it. “so…i guess the guy i can stay with for four months without getting bored will be the one…”

after dialoging with her throughout the night she ended up sheepishly admitting that, yeah, she kinda WOULD like to find “the one” and settle down. it’s like in the movie hitch, no woman wakes up and says “oh, i really hope i DON’T get swept off my feet, today…” you can have all the plans in the world and every ounce of resolve to see them through, but enter that one person that can topple you…and you can change your mind faster than you ever expected.

everyone knew i was toppled before i did. everyone knew HE was toppled before he did, either. and neither of us suspected the other. “are you…OKAY with that?” ask bewildered bystanders as i galavanted off with another boy, professing that i would like to spend the rest of my life with HIM. “uhm…yes…? why wouldn’t i be…?” he replied, honestly confused.

a lot of things grew and died in these past…almost four years, now. things were built and destroyed, nurtured and degraded, loved and shunned. at least outwardly. inside of each of us, something was holding on, trying to locate the other across the county, wishing well into the dead air in between. somehow, that internal grip grew mysteriously stronger and we still gravitated back to the same place, blinking at one another. i remember distinctly thinking to myself, “uh oh. he’s not safe, anymore.” no longer that chummy buddy, that brother i never had, but something else. a beautiful man i suddenly had the urge to touch and be close to. to breathe into his neck and be held…and it scared the snot out of me. i had all these plans, i had to graduate, we were 18 and 19 years old, too young…all the by-the-book reasons love could NEVER unite two souls that were dedicated to making it a priority. never. geeze.

but the Lord in His kindness had a way. a way that consisted of him deciding i was the one and chasing me down hard…and me being forty flavours of neurotic about it. i’m such a ridiculous moron! he has subsequently wrung all sorts of illogical dogma out of me and detoxified my spirit, getting it ready to grow from a much better root this time. i have been fertilized, i suppose? meh.

it’s going to be tough, i’ll give our critics that. but who ever told us that life itself wouldn’t be? with or without someone else? a big house? lots of money? a great, exciting job? would those make life perfect? no! i’ve found my blasted soul mate and i would put a bullet in my head sooner than let him go!

he asked me to be his forever. in the same place we fluidly started our friendship all those years ago. the place we started a fire and roasted mini marshmallows, climbed the willow tree, wrestled, fenced with sticks, and thoroughly learned to enjoy one another’s company. it was at the lake at the local community college, the day was beautiful, and i squealed a lot. and we knew this was coming the day we first announced ourselves “boyfriend and girlfriend.” so, surprise? only the day and the method. the inevitability was between us since last august, this was the goal of us going forward with the relationship at all. we knew enough about one another to know we could work forever before we even “officialized.”

next may, we will become one before our God and our community.

ah, teh glee. 😀