Matthew 25:45

Dr. P. is my family’s doctor.  He has been our primary care physician since before I was born.  He, in fact, delivered me.  Additionally, he is a stalwart member of our church, and his wife organized my mother’s funeral dinner.  He recently wrote a letter to our vestry condemning the consecration of the Rt. Rev. V. Gene Robinson as the first openly homosexual bishop in any mainline Christian denomination (the Episcopal Church USA, of which our church is a parish).  In his letter, Dr. P. urged the vestry to withhold funds from diocesan and national church giving due to their roles in the election and affirmation of Bishop Robinson.  Dr. P. has a gay son with whom he has little contact.

Dear Dr. P.,

I read your letter to the vestry concerning Gene Robinson and the church’s situation with regard to homosexuality.  In all honesty I was shocked by your position.  Knowing you as I do, for as long as I have, I would never have believed you would choose this path.  Do you know that funds withheld from the diocese and the national church are funds withheld from the neediest children in the poorest parts of the world?  Do you know that condemning  gay people of faith is following the path of the Pharisees?  You know that the Pharisees condemned Jesus for not following  the letter of the Law.  He was indicted for performing healing on the sabbath.  He was shunned for eating with lepers and tax collectors.  He loved and was loving among the marginal groups in his community.  The only group Jesus himself condemned were the holy men of influence who would not tolerate his commandment to Love.

Dr. P., we no longer live in that world where homosexual activity was a central practice among pagan groups who wished to criminalize our faith.  We no longer live in that world where procreation was critical to the survival of our tribe.  We live in the world where the message of Christ is a beacon to all corners of creation.  We live in the world  where we understand the historicity ofour biblical inheritance.  We live in the world where homosexuality is not merely a sexual act, but an identity which colors every aspect of the lives in which it is imbedded.  The literal interpretation of biblical judgment concerning homosexuality has no place in our world.  We do not condone slavery.  We do not condone the subjugation of women.  We do not condone crucifixion of our political enemies.

Our Lord said, “for I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not give me clothing, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.”  The disciples were aghast.  When did we do such things, Lord?  And he replied, “Truly I tell you, just as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.” (Mt. 25:42-45 para., NRSV)  If we do not welcome gay men and women then we do not welcome Jesus.  If we refuse to feed the hungry souls of the gay and lesbian faithful then we refuse the hungry soul of Christ. 

I want to talk for a moment about being gay.  I think by now you have heard that I am gay.  I wonder if you know many gay people, and I wonder what your opinion of them is.  I wonder what your thoughts are on the cause of homosexuality and if you think it is a choice or not.  Being trained in medicine, I assume that you have read journal articles about homosexuality, and that you are aware that by and large the medical community believes homosexuality to be of natural origin.  In fact, I believe the accepted understanding is that sexual orientation is determined before the age of 3.  I’m wondering if anyone can credibly argue that a 3 year-old chooses to be gay or not. 

And a little more about being gay, specifically about being gay and Christian.  I’m glad to use my experience as an example, especially since you have known me literally since the day I was born.  You know that I was baptized in our church, was an acolyte, was in the youth group, was a member of the children’s and adult choirs, was confirmed in our church by the suffragan bishop of our diocese, have served as a lay reader, eucharistic minister, and cantor for worship services, have served on the vestry of the parish belonged to when I lived in California, have served in campus ministry and young adult ministry groups, and have been asked more times than I can count, “when are you going to go to seminary?”  I have tried to live my life according to the Word made Flesh.  I have looked for Jesus in every enemy I have known, and most of the time I have found him.  In every way that I know how to do, I have tried to live my life the way I believe Jesus wants me to.  I have talked to him for hours and hours about it, over the course of many years of prayer, song, meditation, and (not enough) action. 

So you should know that I believe I was created gay, and I believe it was a gift.  Sexuality is a gift from God and I don’t know about you, but I enjoy mine!  Now hold on.  All that stuff that you have been lead to believe about promiscuity and perversion among homosexuals – well, it’s all true.  But it’s also true for heterosexuals, and I would guess that as a doctor you knew that already.  And all that stuff about monogamy and having a Christ-centered relationship that is the bedrock of Christian sexual morality – well, I believe that also.  I believe that God wants me to find one person in this world to share a loving,  monogamous relationship with with Christ at the center.  I believe that that person will be a man and that God is fine with that. 

If we are all equal in Christ, then either we’re all fit to lead or we’re not.  (I’m leaning toward not, but I’m a skeptic) I don’t buy the church’s don’t ask-don’t tell policy.  You know the one where we had gay bishops for centuries but we just didn’t admit it?  It was okay with us as long as we didn’t talk about it?  I don’t understand how we can say that we welcome and love our gay and lesbian members, but only if they don’t want to be bishops or priests or have their relationships recognized.

So Dr. P., when you condemn Gene Robinson as unfit to lead the church, you condemn me. I don’t know if you meant to, but when you wrote your letter to the vestry, you hurt me deeply.  My admiration for you is a bit tarnished now, but it’s not obliterated.  I still see Jesus working in your life.  I see him in the way you care for my ailing grandparents, and in the way you give so selflessly to your church and your family.  I see him in your students as they learn from your experience. 

I wonder if you’ve learned anything from mine.  I hope so.

God bless you,

Michael