belly full of butterflies and a red-sauced tofu/arugula sandwich!

I woke up to my morning medication alarm again which goes off at 9:00 AM.  It blows my mind every time I sleep in to that point because I was just not capable of that before taking this new anti-seizure medication, and it makes me think about how my entire adolescent-then-young-adult-then-adult life was full of most-probably-seizure-activity making my brain a malfunctioning piece of flesh inside my skull.

I made my breakfast but before I could eat it I got to exchange texts with Shannon and we talked on the phone for like an hour and a half.  Not about anything pressing, she just enjoys throwing words into my ears and when I respond.  I didn’t say that much because I hadn’t eaten the breakfast I made yet (including my coffee, which makes my brain-wheels start turning!) but I performed my listening tasks and she thanked me for letting her express herself so openly and without judgment (if you’ll notice how I use the “American” spelling of judgment there, am I morphing back into a full-blown American?).  Who knows.

Anyway, we talked on the phone for like an hour.  She told me about how her friends have asked her what she wants for Christmas and she told me that she’s responded with, “Well, the one thing I want I can’t have at the moment!” (referring to me!) so that made me feel genuinely wanted and all-around-good.  I feel like a teenager again, but with the same weathered maturity that I’ve grown over the years so it’s an even cooler way to feel young.  A lot less bullshit to muddle through, and all that.

Well, I don’t know if there’s less or if I’m just better at seeing through it.  Again, probably  a little of both, like most things.

I guess it all just boils down to me being incredibly grateful to still be existing.