Don’t Want To Die Alone

A few minutes ago I realized something. I really don’t want to be alone for the rest of my life.

I realize that it’s not out of the realm of possibilities (especially when you consider some of my bad habits) that I may die alone. After careful consideration though…I think I must admit that I don’t want to go that way.

Yes, I’ve been hurt and scarred by chicks before. Yes, I still have shit that I deal with on an almost daily basis because of my naivety. Yet a part of me can’t stand to be alone.

Yet a part of me wonders if I can really be good for someone.

Perhaps this is why I have yet to move out of my parent’s basement (even though I blame it on all my bills). Perhaps something inside me knows I can’t make it on my own.

Maybe this now means that I’m “available”. Or maybe it just means I’m not entirely turned off to the idea of finding someone that is perfect for me.

I dunno.

All I really know is that loneliness sucks ass.

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“Oh my beautiful liar
Oh my precious whore
My disease
My infection
I am so impure.”
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Nine Inch Nails