The last post

As I stood among the thousands of people this morning at The Cenotaph in Sydney’s Martin Place in the pre-dawn darkness, remembering the amazing people and their service animals who have served, are currently serving, and importantly, paying respect to those brave souls who paid the ultimate price and made the ultimate sacrifice, it filled me and others with pride, hurt, sorrow, and gratitude. It served as a reminder that we all need to tell the people we love that we love them, show our friends that we appreciate them, and reciprocate their love, kindness, and friendship.

Be sure to let go of those who don’t want your attention, those that don’t reciprocate. Moving forward in this life, as we just don’t know if there will be a tomorrow, I am going to choose to enjoy time with the people who enjoy time with me. Love people who love me. I will not go too far out of my way to be something or someone for others who do not need, want, or appreciate the limited time we have or the scarcity of the amount of love one can offer.

‘You do you, boo!’ I wish you all the utmost joy, love, happiness, and health for the remainder of your life. I hope this little rock we call home provides you with all the opportunities and necessities required to live a fulfilled and long-loved life.

Thank you all for being a friend. We either will continue to be friends, or we won’t, but that’s okay—just make sure you give it your all. I will no longer be sacrificing my happiness for someone else’s. I’ll be here for you as your friend, confidant, your brother, but my love and friendship come with a cost, a cost of mutual reciprocation.

Which leads me to the final, the last post to my old friend…”

—

SENT: 0303 Zulu /  1303 ANZAC Day 2024

Hey stranger,

Before I get in my next flight I wanted to reach out and say hello, thank you, and goodbye.

I know you said you hoped one day we could find our way back to a friendship with more clarity, and you can’t see that as an option right now. I truly respect that.

But before I completely lose hope in having some skerrick of a friendship, I wanted to ask you if you still mean it? I know you meant it, but do you still feel the same way?

I’d like to be your friend. I have never, even as brief as it was, had such a good friendship with anyone like this before. It was not my intention for it to become anything more than it was. Yes, it’s clear I fantasized about the idea. I assure you, every male friend you have has probably done the same. But you taught me some very valuable and hard truths, for which I wanted to say thank you.

The not knowing, the waiting, and the wondering is agonizing. It’s a really strange emotion that is new to me. I just cannot stop thinking about it.

I’ve tried everything I’ve ever learned, taught, or heard and ultimately, I miss my wacky, strange friend. Nothing more than that, just my friend.

I am truly sorry for putting you in the position I did, not just in your home life but potentially in your work life too. I really am sorry.

I don’t know if I’m allowed to text you at all. Say hi, send memes, I just don’t know. You called me out for being cold when I said ‘cya’ (warranted), but now I’m the one who has, as the kids say, been ‘left on read’ for a week.

I know this puts you on the spot and I am sorry for that too, but I miss my friend, the jokes, the silliness, and more so the conversation.

So, I need to know.

To be honest, I think I already know the answer, but I need to hear/read it from you.

Assuming it is as I believe, thank you for the past 6ish months. You have been an amazing friend and an amazing mentor for Alishea (who, from my understanding, has gone absolutely rogue, ditching class, vaping, lying to teachers, etc.—I took your advice and flew away).

I hope that you get everything in the world you want for your life, the little dude, and of course, the tribe in general.

Thanks again, please stay safe, as you say, ‘make good decisions.’

I’ll see you around, I’m sure. Until then, goodbye.

Your old friend 

“I always get to where I am going by walking away from where I have been.”

—A. A. Milne, Winnie the Pooh