It’s been a long cold lonely winter Little darling It feels like years since it’s been here

Roofied on at rooftop bar.

*Other readers*

I do not care about your judgments, or maybe I will, but still, here goes.

WARNING OF POSSIBLE EXPLICIT LANGUAGE BELOW!

ONE LAST WARNING, THIS IS NOT FOR THE FAINT-HEARTED!

 

Well, it’s been a while since we talked and since I wrote you anything. How are you doing, young me? Because I am feeling a little lost. We are 5961.227 KM’s from home this trip.

Since landing in Singapore for this trip, It’s been a whirlwind of emotions, feelings of comfort and family, feelings of regret, lost, violated, and missed, but loved too.

Being introduced to B’s family has been amazing. They are so loving and accepting, and I see where she and her boys get it from.

The genes of that family-run deep and so amazingly supportive and beautiful people who would literally take the shirt off their backs to support you.

The other night I went for a nightcap on the rooftop bar here at the motel. All went well, and it was a good time. Then, one of the new friends asked if I wanted to join him at another venue. I had time it was only 9:30, so long as I was back by 11:00, Id be fine for work.

But I don’t remember anything from about 30 mins of being at the new venue. It’s all gone, and now I’ve been blackout drunk before. I’ve partied so hard with things I won’t bring up here and lost bits and pieces of days, but not lightweight two or three drinks and lose 12 hours.

I woke up the following day after housekeeping let one of our fellow travellers in to check on me, I’d lost my phone, some of my bank cards, and the work credit card had been smashed for thousands and thousands of dollars. (don’t get me wrong, we have all had a sneaky beer or two on it, we are allowed mostly) but fucking thousands.

I could lose my job, everyone has been so supportive, but the fact is that the card was/is my responsibility, and I’m accountable for it. Hence the feeling of regret and violation.

What the fuck happened?

Someone found my phone in a phonebooth and somehow, even though it was locked, was able to contact/send messages to the team,

This fascinates me. How did they do that? They had to know the pin. I’ve tried sending messages without unlocking the phone and cannot. Hmmm

I’m told that we can be targets, not for the traditional roofie of slip them a little and root them, but slip them a little and go to town on their credit cards.

According to B’s cousin, who went and retrieved my phone (I didn’t find my pride), it was in a part of town that most foreigners wouldn’t be able to walk out of without a fight or seven. Maybe I was lucky in some ways, I didn’t end up in a gutter, hurt or dead. Maybe I did fight or two on be way out, or the fact I’m about 80kgs and 2 feet taller than most of them, they left me alone?

Maybe in time, it will come back.

— Interlude—

Had a video conference (VC) with L. To be honest, he is a friend, a colleague in most parts business partner, but one of the closest people I have in my life. He is family, and his family is family and his wife too, she’s brilliant!!! She has kept an eye out on me the last few days.

I got COVID in a foreign country. Most people would shit, but I came prepared. Thanks to my Doctor, I had all the meds I needed if something was to happen.

I told them I was signing off and needed some Mr T time, but after two hours of VC drinks, I am much happier and feel great it was nice to shoot the shit.

I don’t know if I can write the way my therapist wants me to write. I can normally only do this while drunk. Ironically, I am drunk, but I am happy!!!

I know it’s not healthy, and yes, I have a drinking problem. My problem is one isn’t enough, and 20 gets me started if there is booze. It needs to be drunk until it runs out or the money does.

I have had half a bottle of Irish Whiskey and a 1-litre bottle of American Bourbon. Not normally my thing, but I want to write.

Or do I just want to be drunk?

What’s your opinion?

I’m going to have a cigarette or two, and come back and try again, maybe ill write maybe I won’t, until then

Thanks for reading….