Sorry, here’s an update

I’ve always thought I should update this thing but when I want to write in here I’m at work and I don’t want them to be able to come across this thing…

I’m still having trouble with the fact that my ex died in August. I don’t know why because I shouldn’t! He was a complete jerk, but he was also my first puppy love and you can never replace that. I know he probably wouldn’t be thinking about me had it been me that passed away but I still can’t help it. I think about him everyday and I just don’t know why. I even have a song that reminds me of him it’s "Just A Dream" by Nelly…. that song shouldn’t remind me of him but it does, probably for the fact that I am hoping that it’s just a dream that this happened to him. I was always hoping I would run into him back home to see what he looked like now but it never happened and now all I’ll know what he looked like is from pictures I’ve seen of him. His Fiance alreasy moved on, he died in August and she found someone in either October or November. I still feel like that’s a little early but I guess everyone has their way of coping. I guess it’s still hard for me to believe that it happened and now I wish I would have kept all my diaries before we moved into our new house so I could look through there and remember all the old times.

A couple weeks ago I was driving to work and this woman in the car in front of me hit some ice and her car went out of control and into the ditch! She ended up rolling onto her side!!! That was the SCARIEST thing to have that happen right in front of you. I tried to slow down so I wouldn’t hit her and also so I wouldn’t go into the ditch and I felt my car slide a little. I finally was able to stop my car a long way down the road and I ran up the busy highway to that car to see if they were alright. They ended up being from Canada and I think they were heading to Arizona. I stayed until the cops showed up and then tired to call into work but they wouldn’t let me not come so I drove to work and when I left work the weather was really bad and I ended up going 30mph on the busy highway. I was SO relieved to make it home!

Also my husband has to go to Iraq 🙁   He joined the National Guard which I’m sure I already wrote that somewhere in here, and now he has to leave 🙁  What the hell am I going to do without my husband??? Our daughter won’t understand why her daddy is gonna be gone for so long… it just REALLY sucks!!! We’re gonna try to go on vacation before he goes and I’m gonna have a surprise 30th birthday party for him in April since he will be over there for his 30th… that sucks 🙁

I’m kinda off and on with the whole photography thing still… I offered 2 free sessions to my sister-in-law’s friends so I could get some more business and experience. Still working on getting what I have done! LONG process but hopefully I can get stuff done soon!

That’s all for now I guess… Hope you all have a safe New Years 🙂   I will be going to bed early since I have to be up at 4am to go to work 🙁