Her soul doth glitter

Walking around my apartment in a sweatshirt with no pants and stirring Metamucil into my hot chocolate. Welcome to my Friday night.

I’m thankful to say I’m exhausted from a week of work. WORK! YOU READ THAT RIGHT!

UPS had the wisdom and foresight to hire me as a seasonal driver’s helper. The work is exhausting and the pay is pennies, but I’m having a blast. I’m covered in bruises, which makes me smile. It is one of my favorite states of being. A sure sign of living. I come home and immediately jump into the shower because I’m covered in grime. Sweat and dirt and black marks that I can never identify, though they show up daily. My driver is a ton of fun. 25-years-old, Nah hails from West Africa. He has been in the US for 7 years, working for UPS for 6, driving for 2. He showers me in appraisal daily and tells the bosses that his helper is the best, a claim that is backed up by my numbers. I average about 20 deliveries an hour.

One of today’s deliveries was the monster of them all. Sixteen odd-shaped packages, all weighing in at about 50 pounds. The load was challenge enough, but we had to deliver them to a house that sits atop an incredibly steep driveway and a winding staircase. I started taking them up, one by one, as my driver stayed at the truck and scanned them all into the system. By the time we got to one that was a team lift I had to talk him into carrying it on our shoulders. My arms were shot. It was long and appeared to be a rolled up rug. As we picked it up my soul glittered. I was putting my power lifting practice to use! In the real world!!! I squatted down in proper deadlift posture. I brought my end of the rug up, powering through my glutes and keeping my weight in my heels. I paused for a beat then did a swift clean and jerk to haul the weight up onto my shoulder.

I love lifting. I’m such a chicken shit, though. I won’t lift without a trainer. Or without a workout buddy at the very least. Without someone to help me focus, I feel the eyes of the bodybuilders around me judging me, correcting my form and mocking the paltry numbers I’m able to pull. When I lift with Joey none of that matters. The rest of the world blurs and I’m able to focus. Without him the raging paranoia steps in.

How did I lose track of my point?

I’m thrilled to report that not only have I just completed a week of work with UPS, but this afternoon I was also notified that I got a part-time admin job with a local personal trainer. Neither UPS nor this admin gig will pay all the bills. Even with the two combined I still come up short. But!!!! Momentum is building!! Things are moving in the right direction and I remain ever hopeful.

As if all this glittery work stuff wasn’t enough, I got to meet in the flesh an internet personality on whom I’ve been mad crushing for a year. Our lives are in similar states of tumult and it was grand being able to pass the time with him. I highly doubt he has any idea how much his intelligence and life experience intimidate me.

Typing and deleting, typing and deleting. There is more to say about him, but I am still processing.