Almost Ready for My Close-Up

I’ve got the itch and no amount of Vagisil is going to cure it.
 

It’s old news to long-time readers that I’m passionate about the field of adult entertainment. I aspire to work both in front of and behind the camera and have for years. But it seems it has always been pushed to the back burner. After all, when is it logical to peruse something like acting, directing or even producing? Instead I work full-time at one job or another telling myself I will follow my dreams *when the time is right*. Newsflash: the time will NEVER be right! There will always, ALWAYS be a reason not to step out of my comfort zone and do what I really want to do with my life. Slowly and not surely at all I’ve been pushing myself to tip toe away from my safety net and dip back into the waters of entertainment. The past shows I’ve done have always involved an established contact, be it friend or family. Never have I thrust myself into a project where I didn’t know anyone involved. I still find the idea wildly intimidating so, chicken that I am, I took the safest route possible: community college. I’m currently taking an acting course on Wednesday evenings. I’ve taken this class at this same college in years past, but this time it’s a different teacher. Little did I know that this man is also an acting professor at USC, was an actor on Days of Our Lives, was a writer for NYPD Blue, is the father of a sitcom star… I was overwhelmed! Landing an acting teacher with his credits was pure coincidence, but it has opened up a world of possibility for me. The fact that he incorporates the business side of acting into the class is priceless knowledge every actor needs to have in order to survive, but what he has done for me goes beyond brushing up my resume. His passion for performance has helped me to rediscover mine. Being lost in the corporate world does little stimulate my creativity but since class has started I’ve seen a significant difference in the way my mind works. No longer am I volunteering Saturdays for overtime (yes, I actually did – and somtimes do – that).
 

Networking has never been an attractive prospect for me. I’m not a salesman. I don’t derive pleasure from spending an evening bullshitting with complete strangers, but with proper motivation I can put on a happy face. And over the past few weeks I’ve actually been seeking opportunities to mingle. I’ve been attending screenings and setting up Starbucks meetings (cliché, but it works) and I’m really starting to get my groove back. I’m volunteering with the International Documentary Association. This morning I even scribbled out treatments for two short films!* It feels as though a part of me is waking up again. Generally, I’m good at self-motivating; I’m not good at taking action. At least now I’m finally starting to truly put myself out there and already things seem to be changing for the better.
 

*The treatments I wrote today were a direct result of viewing the short films on Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s website hitrecord.org. One can find inspiration in the oddest forms. I personally recommend Sugartown Traders. There’s nothing like watching Joe get murdered while dressed in drag. *woot*