End of Leave

Wednesday I go back to work,  I’ll start at 6am. I need to find out what Roger’s plan is. Roger will bring Bruce to my mom (35 minutes away). Roger usually is working that direction so it’s not really out of his way to drop him off. I’m just not sure when he needs to leave home, leave my parents. I will need to feed Bruce. I will have the bag packed Tuesday nights. I have to leave home at 5:30am. I need to know what time I need to get up. I am scheduled til noon. So I’ll go pick Bruce up, unless Roger text me saying he’s done early.

Thursday I’ll work at noon. My mom will come here, when Roger gets home, she can leave. I’ll be home at 6:30pm. I’ll be working every other weekend, I’ll work this weekend. Both days are 6am-noon. Roger doesn’t work weekends. I’ll probably get up at 4:30am to get ready and feed him.

I have mixed emotions. I KNOW it’ll be good for both Bruce and me for me to go to work. It’ll be good for him to not always be with me. I’m starting to see the attachment. It’ll be good for him to learn to go with other people. And what’s great is the "other" people are my parents and Roger. It’ll be good for Roger too, to spend more time with Bruce without me. For me it’ll be good to get back into the swing of things, be nice to make some money.

On the otherhand, I don’t want to leave my baby! I’ve always dreamt of being a stay at home mom and I know Roger wishes I could. With the work Roger does, it might come in really nice in the winter if work is dead, I’ll be working. Bruce for the most part sleeps thru the night. For instance, last night he went down at 10pm. Woke up at 8. Been nice to me to sleep. Also if he does get up in middle of the night, it doesn’t matter cause I can go back to sleep, take a nap during the day if I have to. The other night he did get up at 3am. It was nice knowing I didn’t have to get up in an hour for work.

Roger points out I’m really not gone that long. Yeah I know. Hopefully going back to work it really won’t seem long and everything goes smoothly. I’m just glad I  don’t have a 40hour a week job, I wouldn’t be able to handle that.

So now, I’m here sad about this new change. Tomorrow night I have to get him ready. Booooo.