In Memory

August 27, 1929 – July 1, 2003

A.D.G. ~ My Dad

The world lost an extraordinary man and we, our father. A loss so huge I haven’t been able to put into words any thoughts or feelings-just writing the words took some time to recover from.

An incredible father to the very end, he left when it became too difficult for us to see him struggling for breath. It was too painful for us and for mom. I was with him, as well as my mom and sister. It still brings me such pain in remembering and the shock of it feels fresh again, yet I am thankful I was there and someday the memories will fade enough to not hurt quite so much. But not just yet, oh God, this is still so very hard.

The last week, all 4 of us kids were there, right by his bedside and mom in their home. At first sleeping in chairs and couches around the hospital bed. We are, and know it, incredibly lucky to have had that time, Dad was mostly coherent until the last couple of days. He never lost his sense of humor and had us all cracking up at one his one liners. None of us wanted to miss a single word he uttered, to us or to the angels around him, didn’t want to miss a single syllable uttered in his distinctive Swedish accent and all motion would cease when he spoke.

We all had a chance to say the last, oh so important things to dad and he to us, and we feel blessed by that. I love you’s-never a common phrase at our house, became one and none of us left the room without telling dad what we were doing. The nurse had said he could hear everything at all times.

As our parents raised us to, we stuck together us kids. At times it would become too much, of course, the pain would overwhelm one of us and we’d have to go outside, take a walk, something, to get our emotions under control. Then, in a bit, one of us would follow, to make sure we were okay and offer a shoulder, or cry together. We’d all faced hard times before but nothing, nothing can prepare you for this.

Hospice was just fantastic, what wonderful, truly wonderful people. I don’t think we’ll ever forget them. That takes a special person, and the ones we met and that helped us all so much, were so special. They helped mom so much, even beforehand to prepare and took over completely when Dad had to go. God Bless them.

The last 3 months have been completely devoted to Dad, and helping mom. I have memories I want to share and never, ever want to forget and need to write them down. Right now though, this is all I can do.

God Bless You Dad.

I love you with all my heart.

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I’m so sorry for you and your family’s loss, {{{{M}}}}.

Oh my friend…I am so very, very sorry. You were very blessed to have goodbye time as hard at that is. You and your family have been in my thoughts and prayers and will remain there. I know how hard this is and my arms are around you. love to you…..

July 17, 2003

I’m so sorry – I’d wondered how things were going. I’m glad you got to spend that last bit of time together, but I know it doesn’t make it any easier.

July 17, 2003

Oh sweetie, I’m so, so sorry. Your dad is whole and healthy and smiling down on you now though. Of course, I know you miss him with all your heart and then some. I’ve thought of you often this summer, wondering how things were going with you. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. If you need anything, know that I am here to listen. *Huge Hugs*

July 17, 2003

..(continued after a pause) I don’t know whether going suddenly or having longer and knowing is worse. My father-in-law died very suddenly, and it was a horrible shock but at least he didn’t linger or suffer. Now my sister-in-law has been diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor. She’s doing well, but the prognosis is pretty hopeless. So, I guess my point is it’s all hard. I’m really sorry, though.

July 17, 2003

So sorry you had to go through that but again glad you got the chance to say goodbye properly & let him know how you felt about him – it makes such a difference. I’m glad too you were able to write a little bit – the rest will come in time. Love,

July 18, 2003

Oh, no… I’m so so so sorry… {{{hugs}}}

July 18, 2003

I’m so sorry. You were truly blessed to have that time with him and truly blessed to have a wonderful father. Praying for you and your family. HUGS!!!

July 19, 2003

Sol, I’m very sorry for your loss. Keep those memories close to your heart. What a beautiful tribute. Huggies!

July 24, 2003

(((M)))) I don’t know how I missed this entry. I’ve been thinking of you so much since you wrote last. I’m so sorry. It must have been so difficult, but I’m glad you had your siblings around you. Prayers and hugs, I’m so so sorry. *tears*

{{{M}}} Just stopping by to give you a hug. love you…..

God bless you, and my prayers go out to you and your family in your loss.

August 4, 2003

Miss you, (((M))))

August 11, 2003

I love you, sisterfriend. I AM sorry – I know he was an amazing man, and you were blessed to have each other. Much Love,

August 16, 2003

Sol, where have you been? Hoping you are doing okie.. Huggies.

Please let us here from you. I miss you.

August 29, 2003

Thinking of you… hugs,

September 7, 2003

Hey, I hope you come back. Miss you. (((M)))

September 25, 2003

Miss you. Hope you are doing okay. Hugs and prayers!

September 26, 2003

HI. Hope you’re thinking of coming back. Miss you & Hugs,

September 26, 2003

ummm, it’s me. Lucky. *:-)

September 26, 2003

You were highlighted but no entry, hope all is going well, your grandson must be really huge, write when you can. HUGS!

September 28, 2003

You were highlighted on my list – RATS! Hope you’re doing ok. I was just wondering about you. My niece’s baby just turned one, so I know Logan’s got his first one right about now too!