Invisible
I find I often feel invisible. Like no one cares to listen to what I say. I tell someone to do (or not do) something, for reasons X, Y and Z, and then they go and completely disregard that. I feel it happens most often at home. No one in this house, except maybe my own kid, actually listens to me. Or pays attention to how I’m feeling, or what I’m doing. There is no regard for my thoughts or feelings. How can I feel so alone in a house full of people? It’s damn frustrating. And it makes me feel very small and unimportant.
For instance: today, stepdaughter asked to use the fancy camera. When I asked why, she said she wants to take pictures with her aunt, who is visit. Stepdaughter has been sick for the past two weeks, constantly complaining about her chest hurting from coughing and how she feels like death. So, I said that she needed to rest and not be doing all this walking around that she’s been doing recently so that her body can heal. I said this with her aunt in the room. Half an hour later, I find out they’ve been doing hair and makeup and are going to take pictures later. What the fuck. The worst of it is, SO doesn’t back me up about 75% of the time.
At this point, why do I even bother? I can feel myself retreating further and further from this family.