A Day and a Half

That is how long it has been since my last cigarette. I have stopped smoking. Not by choice, mind you, but merely because my lungs are already rejecting air, I hardly think smoking will help any.

I was starting to feel sick on Saturday night, but I went out to a party anyway, being the designated driver. Sunday morning, I woke up and my chest really hurt, and my cough sounded very dry and hurt.

Well, blah blah blah- worked all morning, feeling dizzy, but muddling through. By the time 7:15 came around, I thought I would make it through the rest of my 14 hour shift. But, my chest started to feel really tight, and I could barely breathe. Every time I tried to take a deep breath, I started to cough, therefore forcing me to take shallow breaths. I tried to keep under control, but someone woudl look at me and ask me what was wrong, and I would start crying, making it even harder to breathe.

Finally, my manager asked me if they wanted me to have them call an ambulance. I said no, I’d be fine, I needed the money. My friend Tatiana told me to sit down while she dropped off my last check. I sat in the back, once again trying to take a deep breath. Tatiana walked back to where I was, with the guy that was at my last table- he was a paramedic.

He asked me about what was wrong, and suggested two things: Either call an ambulance, have them check me out and give me breathing treatments in the back of the ambulance, and at that time I could deny treatment at the hospital. Or, I could make someone drive me straight to the hospital (within 2 minutes, that is what he said) I started to panic, again, and my manager called an ambulance.

I went out there, still in my apron, and all my money still on me. The ambulance driver asked me questions, and then hooked me up to two different types of machines, to try and regulate my breathing. After two treatments, my chest was still wheezing. They told me they HAD to take me to the hospital. Mike came out, and followed me.

I felt like such a geek- getting picked up from work for a simple breathing issue. At the hospital, the gave me more breathing treatments. Mike was there, followed by my mom, followed my Matt and his girlfriend- I had a posse there. It was hilarious. Every doctor and nurse told me the same thing: STOP SMOKING. So… I did… cold turkey. It’s been a day and a half, and I won’t lie… I want a cigarette REALLY bad. And I am not sure if I will quit smoking for good, but at least for now. I want to try it for at least the better part of a week.

I have had no desire to actually smoke though, merely because my lungs can barely handle oxygen, let alone carbon monoxide and nicotine. I just want that oral fixation- I’m sure this will cause me to gain like 30 pounds.

Anywho- I am going to lay down, and relax… try to cough up all the nasty shit I know is coming. Later all 🙂