Track marks

I am terrible at writing when I am thinking about it. I actually do write but just don’t post. I write word documents, save them and end up forgetting to post them because the baby needs me or a phone rings etc.

I am not sure what I wrote last time but I have no Internet right now (on the train) so I will just write as my thoughts come. I apologize for repeats but I don’t think I have many faithful readers anymore anyway.

~I have had one interview with a really great family. They did not offer me the job because their temporary nanny has asked to stay with them instead of returning to their friends. Their friends said it was fine with them so they don’t need me. I have another interview this coming Friday night and I have been asked for a resume by another family. I am going to try to schedule an interview for Saturday with that family if they like my resume. I need to find a job for September as soon as possible. It stresses me out to not have one lined up. I need to know what my income will be.

~I’m very excited for graduate school. I am excited to be in classes again and looking forward to meeting new people. I hope I make a few good friends.

~My boss has a friend that is currently in a coma. Long story short, he fell and hit is head which caused bleeding on his brain. He had two major surgeries and was thought to be brain dead and fully paralyzed. Hundreds of people prayed and he has shown the doctors what a miracle is…regardless if it was luck, prayer or a moon phase. He has moved all of his limbs and his toes/fingers. He has responded to pain tests with movements and eye flutters and has opened his eyes when hearing his three oldest sons speak to him on a phone. His youngest son is 4months old, his older three are 3,5, and 7yrs old. Will he ever be “normal”? Nobody know but do we all have faith he could be himself again, absolutely.

~I am participating in the National Down Syndrome Buddy Walk in NYC this fall. I am very excited to walk in honor of my friend’s son. His name is Grady and he is currently 5months old. I have raised over $100 at this point and other people are raising money as well. We have a team goal of $2000 and my personal goal is $250. I think we can do it! If anyone is willing to donate ANY amount please leave me a private or public note and I will post a private note with my personal page link so you can donate. I’d really appreciate any support anyone can give. He is a blessed child with a little something extra and I want to see him reach his full potential. Unfortunately he has some hurdles to overcome but I am happy to say his family is amazing and he will go far in life.

~I went to the strongman competition last weekend in CT with Derek to see his brother compete. His brother did amazing although he did not win. He really put on a great show for his first attempt at going pro! He will succeed in the near future if he keeps performing as he did. Derek and I had an amazing time. We really connect well together. There is an extreme level of comfort. I cannot explain how I feel around him. I am truly happy and I would love to see our relationship develop into more. I’m not asking him for any type of commitment or even an acknowledgement of feelings at this point. However, he is telling me often that I am the most amazing woman he has ever met and how lucky he is to have me in his life all of these years. He has expressed interest in a future with me although we talk about it minimally because of our current living situations. He lives near Philly PA while I am on Long Island. I will be switching locations, jobs and routines in a few weeks. He has just began a new job and a new routine that involves traveling the country for work. I am waiting to see what my schedule is and then I can ask him how he feels about a commitment if I feel I have enough time to dedicate to him. He has some flexibility with his travel schedule so there is potential. We need to see what happens before trying to rearrange our lives for each other.

~I went drinking last night. I needed a night of enjoyment and self indulgence. I am friends with the owners of the bar so my friend and I drank for free the entire night. I tried not to take advantage of the situation but I did get my fair share. I stuck with beer to become full before blacking out and it worked well. I drank without counting but took no shots and touched no liquor. I went to bed about 3am by myself and woke up at 8:30am by myself and happy. I hate that I am proud to not wake up with a guy after a night at a bar but I am proud. I had a bad streak for a bit there and I’m happy to say it is over.

~I’m starting to become emotional over the idea of leaving the family I have lived and worked with for over two years. I have not lived in the same place for 2yrs since 2002. That is difficult for me to phantom. I am excited for a change but sad to leave the family I love and adore. I know it needs to be for all of us but it’s hard none the less.

~I have decided I need to learn more about politics, healthcare and current events in general. I am going to begin reading more online sources and paying closer attention to related articles in the daily paper. I am an intelligent person but ignorant about these current happenings. I want to know more and now is the time.

~I am on the train but cannot post this because of lack of Internet. I am going to try to post it from Penn Station but may have to wait till tomorrow night. I will post this though!