one at a time

I’m taking more vitamin C than ever before. I have a cold and cannot handle being “really” sick. I just want this runny nose, sinus pressure, and headache to go away!
We just finished mid-terms. I have an A on one, an A on another because the teacher lost it and an unknown on 2 more. I just want to be done, to finish the semester quickly.
I almost quit my job. I know almost doesn’t count and I’m actually glad I didn’t jump and do it so quickly. I need to think of my financial future. I need a job or a court settlement before leaving this job. I love the children and their mother and NYC but cannot handle the lack of sleep, crying/poor behaviors of the girl, and their mother’s oblivion to the girl’s behavior problems. She gives in whenever the girl screams or cries. I become increasingly angry with each passing day. Weekends are obviously the worst because their mother is home with me. We’ve moved the kids into beds because the little girl was climbing out of the crib and landing on her face. She cries for hours each night, wakes up after an hour or two of sleep and cries for 1-7hrs depending on the night. Her brother sleeps through it all but not soundly so he becomes irritable and easily provoked. They fight, cry, and whine all day. He has a severe cold and an ear infection. I had to keep him home from pre-school Monday (they go twice a week for 2hrs). He was so sad. Halloween was a nightmare; they didn’t listen to their mother and cried a ton because she gave them lollypops then took them away.
I have tried to speak to my boss about my issues with the job but she avoids the conversation. She is in for a shock when I leave. I don’t plan on working for her in January. I plan to be gone for my last semester so I can focus on school rather than her insanely crazy house with dogs and kids who dictate our every move.  I’m tired of dog piss, barking, crying, screaming, rule seeing broken by the rule –setter, no breaks, long hours, high expectations, lower than average pay, bedbugs, and walking on tip-toe because my boss is asleep at 8pm.
My love life doesn’t exist. James and I are friends. We are okay but I miss him more than I can put into words. I saw Kenny the fire-fighter….he slept over one night. God bless the FDNY and the body on that man. Too bad we were pretty drunk and it was all a bit hazy/rushed. We also had to stay VERY quiet because of the kids and boss sleeping. It was really just sex; I enjoy him as a person but not enough to want more. I keep wishing I wanted more but he doesn’t either…it’s obvious. I hear from my hair dresser but don’t see him, he knows I’m done. He is smart like that. I talk to Ross still…he’s an old friend who lives in NJ that I saw in the spring. We keep saying we will spend more time together but it hasn’t happened because of our work schedules.
I guess I’m just ready for my life to slow down. I want a routine I enjoy more than this. I feel like I rush through my days without enjoying anything around me. I need to slow down, relax, and enjoy life. I like being busy, I like constant motion but not this rushed pace. I need to more quickly than most but this is too much for me.
Maybe later I’ll write an entry about my weight/eating issues. I just don’t have it in me right now.