September 25, 2006

words that drip hope into my heart

Well… after the long talk that Chris and I had I went out and applied to a couple places. I applied at two places on Sunday and I have a job today. I am a weekend driver for Advanced Auto Parts! I work 8-5 on Saturday… and 9-1 on Sunday.

Chris told me that I hard to start building his trust in me again…. and by getting a job since I said that I was willing to help us keep the house, he is beginning to trust me. I know that in my heart I am rushing things… I know that this is not going to be the miracle cure to our broken relationship, but I hope that this is a start. I hope that he realizes that I would do anything for him to trust me again.

I guess I should be excited… Chris said that he was proud of me for standing up for our house… for us… and I know that he didn’t say it in so many words, but I guess I am hoping that he feels that. I know that Chris and I have a lot of work to do on us… I know that Chris needs space and I keep jumping the gun at every little sign of improvement. I wish there was something more that I could do help Chris trust me… and I know that I can’t do anything but wait and show him as much as I can that I am trustworthy.

I have to catch up in school… and I have to catch up in my bills… and this new job will help. And I still have weekend nights free to study and go out.

Small steps… small steps… and eventually I will get there I hope. Chris and I were talking over the weekend… he said that we should start saving money so that we I finally finish school we can move somewhere nice and have money to move with. I tried to remain calm and just smile that he said it, just smile that he still thinks of us together in the future. Its those small tiny things that give me hope… that help me feel like we will get back together.

I have to get over the depression… get over the cutting… move forward in life… and let Chris see that he can trust me and that I am willing to be strong for not only him, or me, but us as well.

leaden.wings

September 26, 2006

it sounds like he does see a future. baby steps are always good. i hope things works out with you two

try not to jump on the gun so fast when you see improvments.. i know its going to be hard. but i know you can do it! 🙂 im happy to hear that your got the job. things are looking better already for you. keep me posted.. i hope things work out.. best wishes !! xo

whatever you do, try not to give your hopes up.. I’m not saying think the worst is going to happen, just know it’s possible. this entry made me smile 🙂 i’m happy he is slowly coming around. <3 you!!!

missing soul girl

what does it mean if you want to cry for no reason.like me

Shazar

Yes, be strong. You are so beyond capable of it! Congratulations on the job. 🙂 Take care of your self, okay?

Mistress-Rain

September 27, 2006

Good Luck! and even if you take a little step back once in a while, concentrate on all the steps forward you have made! Glad you enjuoyed, visit me again soon! Rain x

committhis2memory

Good luck with all of that 🙂

Over the Rainbow

What did you do that made him not trust you?

Small steps are the best, I think. If you take steps that are to big, you get somewhat confused. I know it’s hard, but just be patient with Chris. It sounds like he’s comming around. Congrats on the job. Hugs from,

ryn: O ok..it all makes sense now. Its kinda like he’s punishing you now for what you did. I hope everything works out for you. I would do anything right now to make things work with me and D. I hate love.

RX♥queen//

oh that’s so good. i’m glad that you are doing better, and that he is noticing makes it so much better i know. …ela

This Opinion of Mine

aww okay well done hunni, see your getting there i love you <33 me xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

NFG

I hope everything works out for you. You deserve to be happy, ecpecially after all the other shit guys have put you threw. much love, Tara

September 29, 2006

ill try but i couldnt talk to him today cause i didnt see him so yeah but ill find out at homecoming

September 30, 2006

u can go to my art class in my place if you like, rigth now we are doing ‘patterns in nature’..it’s hard..cos u have to hav a pattern…and there aren’t like ne in what i have done haha! <33 ~ Always, charli .x.

The only reason I am not going to ask Sarah about there relationship is because she absolutelly hates me and wont even talk to me so why try?

nyrhtak

I hope things work out for you guys…I think they will:)

Trav'sPooh

October 1, 2006

your right, small steps is the key… hang in there, good-luck -K

October 2, 2006

thanks, i feel sowwi for them to!! <33

hey sweety i’m all packed up and ready to go i have my own horse called wolf i think i’m going to love it look i haven’t got time to say all i want to say cos i have to find warm stuff to wear i’ll be riding my horse all night just go onto darkfaith and read the messages there okay i love ya bye

Thanks for the advice. For my part, I’ll definatley move slow. Hugs from,