wherever you are… I feel love (long)*pics too*

The first official day of Rob’s deployment has come and gone. I made it… cried once.

Amanda and I went to a party last night. She said that I shouldn’t stay around my house and I should come out and have fun. It was nice… did some things that I shouldn’t of… drinking… smoking… I am trying to not do those things so much, well the smoking at all. Gotta leave the drugs alone and clean up my act, but hell I wanted to feel that numb feeling for a bit. It didn’t last long, but it was nice while it lasted. Amanda was soooo trashed! OMG! She and I had some coconut rum and lemonade, though she drank most of it. And she did about 6 shots of Bacardi… she was sloshed! She spent most of the night telling me that she loved me and that she was sorry that I wasn’t the one who was drunk and rolling around on the floor. I had fun with her.

I kept looking at my phone and getting upset (Rob is the background… and I know that you are thinking, just change it, but I can’t bring myself to) so Amanda took my phone away. Then I heard the ring of a text message and got all excited, and then I thought to myself… there is no way that is Rob. And then Amanda checked it and said "Laura… its Rob"  We text back and forth for a bit and then he says that he is going to call….

*jumped up and down all the way up the stairs*

We didn’t talk for long, but I got to hear his voice and hear him laugh and hear him say I love you. Thats all I needed. After we hung up I cried for a bit, but Amanda came to get me and we went back to the party. I had a bit more to drink. And then gave this guy Dan and back massage… after he told me that he loved me! Hahaha my back massages are amazing! Then the alcohol finally got to Amanda and we spent the next 2 hours in the bathroom… I held her hair.

I tried to sleep… again another sleepless night. I slept on the couch… just like I do at my place… and stared out the window and just thought about everything. I gotta stop doing that, but I just can’t sleep. My mind races and I start to cry and that makes it almost impossible to sleep. *sigh* I know that it is going to catch up with me soon, but I try so hard to sleep. Maybe after more time goes by I will be able to sleep, but until then I am the insomnia queen.

I am sure that Rob thinks I am a big baby…. he is always telling me to think of other things and do things to occupy my time, but I am trying and that isn’t really working. I will just have to take the depression as it comes and deal with it. I can’t think of anything else to do. I mean I have talked to him…. he called me from Kuwait tonight and it was so awesome to hear from him already, but still…. its just not the same. It has only been a day, maybe it will get better as more time goes by. I hope so.

I was busy almost all day today. My mum got a huge migraine and if that happens she is incompacitated. So that left Rebecca and me to pick up the Easter slack. We went to the store and got food and Target to get stuff for our Easter baskets… so no surprises this year. I know exactly what I am getting, I bought it myself… lol!

I dyed Easter eggs with the family tonight… I made one for Rob. Without saying a word to me my brother made me an egg that says Laure & Rob on it…. I love David, he always knows how to make me smile. I took pictures of them and hopefully when Easter is over tomorrow I will have even more pictures to put up here. But for right now I have the best pictures ever… more picture of Rob and me!!!

~*~PICTURE TIME~*~

Lyndsay, me, Amanda, Maggie

drunk Amanda rolling around on the floor

Margie, Lyndsay, Alex, me, Kathleen, Amanda, Maggie

Rob and me… when I was in Washington

yeah… I miss his kisses already

I love his eyes and his smile in this pic

I love this picture… so much romance

just a random picture of me today… before I got the rest of these other ones printed

So that is the end of today… enjoy the pictures.