singing again to myself, a head full of hectic

*HUGE RANTING ENTRY….. READ WITH CAUTION*

Sometimes I feel like I am running but not getting anywhere. I think that I have a problem with money that I have to really work on…. but it will be so much easier once my stupid car is paid off. It seems like every time I turn around my mum is yelling at me about all the money that I owe. I don’t know where she expects me to find all this money… I put gas in my car and pay for the cell phone and my car… thats all the money that I have. I hope that when I get my 2 jobs this summer that I can just save all the money. My car will be paid in June… fucking finally….. $12,000 I have shelled out for my sweet ride over 4 years. It doesn’t sound like a lot, but when you only make $8,000 a year and you have to buy all your own things like clothes, the cell phone, GAS, food, dr visits, medicine, school supplies, pet supplies…. it all adds up to that is not enough money. *SIGH*

So now I am totally wiped out… and I am on ‘E’ and I have to go to work and school 3 more days before I get paid…. hmmm…. yeah that doesn’t work.

I think I have about 4 papers that I have to write and an observation that I have to do that I think I am going to end up bullshitting!

I also have 2 finals to study for and 2 more tests.

My job flooded the other day… we lost almost half of our supplies. I was at work from 2:15-10pm and I usually get off at 6pm. I spent the whole day touching gross, wet things and throwing away almost all of our stuff! It was so frustrating… but atleast we didn’t lose the tv or the dvd player. I was so stressed I was losing my mind by the end.

Not to mention everything that I have going on….

Can’t I just catch a fucking break? Just once…. just fucking once?!

My mum is not making it any easier… sometimes I just want to run her over with my car. There are either not enough hours in the day or too many.

Chris has been pissing me off lately…. telling me all this stuff….. trying to be all over me. Its uncomfortable…. and wrong. We all hung out at the movies the other day and he kept trying to hug me and hold my hand and touch me… kissing my forehead if I would turn around…

ummm…. hello? Chris… do you remember Rob… my BOYFRIEND?!?!?!?! What the hell? I told him that I am not comfortable at all with him doing that! Then he said… well maybe one day soon you can sleep in the same bed with me again… WHAT?

So yeah… my patience is rapidly evaporating… with everything!