Taking a break on the Wii…

So I am taking a break on the Wii for tonight as I am starting to kinda dread doing it and I don’t want it to be something I hate doing cuz then I might just give up. I haven’t missed a day in 35 days so I think one weekend day is OK. Also, my son is sick so I think he will again be up all night. Last night I had to just go to bed early cuz he wouldn’t go back to sleep. When I don’t get my night time to do stuff for me I tend to start to feel a little resentful and I don’t want to get like that.

SO my therapist finally called me back and he’s like call next week and by Monday or Tuesday we can hopefully sort this out of when we will meet. He took a lot of time getting back to me and not sure if I wanna just see him yet. Still feel too fat to see him. Hmm, what else…I just hate feeling and being fat. I hate the fact that I even care. I just want this whole shit to be done with. Like do I really want to live my entire life denying my desires. If I were to die tomorrow would I be happy that I never got to really enjoy my life cuz I was always thinking of food. Would being thin be enough to say, ya my life was lived well. I don’t think so. But why still does it seem so important to me. It just does and I really do hate it. Why do I have to feel so unworthy at my healthy weight and only feel worthy when I am 95lbs. Why? So many questions, so little answers.

Anyways, I am gonna go read or something and enjoy my night. Take care everyone….Hope your weekend goes GREAT!! Don’t WORRY, EAT, LOL….