Life is a gift…It shouldn’t be taken for granted

I am slowly coming to the realization that Life, my life, your life, is a gift that should NOT be taken for granted. I have this weird habit where I look at the obituaries all the time for my city. It really gets me thinking about life, death, and the in between. Like did these people really, truly enjoy their life and live it to the fullest? Did they have unresolved issues, regrets? Did they cherish every moment of their life? Probably not 100% as I don’t think anyone does. But it really makes me question life. I am here now, I have two healthy kids, a husband, my mom and dad and brothers and sisters. They’re all still here, alive and healthy. I am truly blessed for that. But, I do NOT know what life will bring me tomorrow or the next day. It gets me thinking I need to embrace this life I am currently blessed with because things change and change can happen so fast that you don’t see it coming.

I am not guaranteed that my kids will outlive me so I need to embrace their life with joy and love. I need to cherish them and treasure this time we DO have right now. This is what I have, THE MOMENT—–Nothing more and nothing less. I have NOW. Am I happy with what I am doing with this precious gift of life???? NO, not really. I still let my ED dominate my life, take over and determine my happiness and my actions. I shouldn’t let it and am trying to let go but it is so hard. I have just been hearing of lots of suicides lately, and deaths and all that and frankly it saddens me and scares me a little. LIfe is so precious. So precious. I need to be all that I can be, the best person I can be. I need to love myself, love others, be kind to others and generous and gracious in all that I do. Because, after all, we are ALL human and when I am down I hope and pray that there will be people to pick me up.

Thank God, I am alive and well.