losing my religion
"(under the bridge downtown)
I gave my life away …"
-"Under The Bridge" by the Red Hot Chili Peppers
when i was 14 i lived near a creek that had a little bridge over it
……i used to go sit under the bridge and smoke…
one night while i was hanging out like a troll ….this guy came down
….he was 5 years older than me and one of the "cool" kids and was
rather cute …his name was dale.
i didn’t want to get caught smoking, my mom would kill me, so i sat
very quiet and did not make my presence known …..but dale did ….he
jerked off, right there, in front of me …..and he sprayed his cum
into the creek under the light of the moon.
well i was mesmerized, positively bewitched …and raced down there
every night and waited in the shadows for the shadowy man to return.
And he did, night after night i would watch him give his seed back to
the earth
well, eventually he caught me …but was not ugly about it at all.
one night he asked if i’d like to watch a little closer and i did and
i moved in right beside him to watch. one night he asked me if i
wanted to try doing it and i definitely did and he was gentle and
patient and taught me how to give great hand jobs …instructing each
movement, explaining all the parts of a cock that made guys feel good
…it took me awhile to get it right and there were many times i lost
my nerve and he had to finish the job for me. i would watch him give
his seed back to the earth
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one night, in the summer i was 14 he asked me if i knew what a blow
job was and if i wanted to try it ….well of course i wanted to try
it, as there didn’t seem to be anything ugly about what we were doing.
he explained there isn’t really any sucking involved, or blowing for
that matter. he told me what would feel good to him, he taught me how
to open my throat and breathe a specific way so i wouldn’t gag
…instructing each movement, he was gentle and patient and taught me
how to give great blow jobs …it took me awhile to get it right and
there were many times i lost my nerve and he had to finish the job for
me. i would watch him give his seed back to the earth
so …at the end of the summer, labour day weekend, his parents went
away and there was a party at vince lundy’s house ….dale was there,
so, one night, in the summer i was 14 he asked me if i knew what it
was like to make love and if i wanted to try it ….well of course i
did as there didn’t seem to be anything ugly about what we were doing.
he explained everything ….how it would feel, when it would hurt,
how gentle he would be …..
for 3 months i had raced down to the bridge every night and waited in the shadows for the shadowy man’s return. night after night i would watch him give his seed back to the
earth and it had seemed beautiful …..like an art.
We slipped into
the master bedroom and he locked the door and moved the dresser in
front of it. In the phosphorescent moonlight he laid me down and
he told me how my body should move to feel the most amount of pleasure
possible, he taught me how to rock my hips and arch my back in a
specific way so i would always be able to feel beautiful
…instructing each movement, he was gentle and patient and taught me
how to truly make love …..wit
h all of my body.
it really didn’t take me any time at all to get it right and i never
lost my nerve, it’s like it came natural to me. i watched his face as
it twisted in ecstasy
and there was nothing ugly about it
Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah