Hard night

It’s raining outside but it feels like storming. Today I’m experiencing hungry stomach with knowing that my parents are alive but they won’t give me food. My mother, she is doing her job great but… somehow. Okay! I just don’t want to show weak. I really don’t know what is happening with me. She was behaving awkward. I know it’s not the first time. She doesn’t give me enough food. I don’t want a lot but 2rotis and any veg. But everything is happening so bad . It’s not her fault. She used to blame me for her situation. I know that a mother and son relationship is better than a mother-daughter relationship. She blames me for her financial condition. I know my family is paying for my graduation. And I feel lucky for that. But those regular taunts doesn’t make me feel happy. I also want to do a part time job. But they don’t allow. Okay! According to them daughters shouldn’t get allowed for doing job. I know I have many restrictions . My mother ,she always say that oh I think you are full maybe this food I should give to your brother . It’s okay. After getting a job I will just run away from here and I will never come back. I feel like cry….but…I don’t want to look weak. I’m very strong. But I’m hungry and helpless.