Paper…

Even though I am light years away from Ireland, they have come into the 21st century an I have a subscription to my local paper online. I love it. Every Wednesday I look forward to seeing what is going on and who might be in the paper that I know.

It also makes me sad. Sad that I am missing all that progress and change. Sad that I am not on the ‘nights out’ page with my friends. Sad that I cant go and see that band play, or that show.

On the other hand, it is terrifying. There was this guy I went to school with. His name was James and he was SO annoying. He annoyed me for a weird reason. The same reason Cliona annoyed me. Although I was very smart, I could NOT study. I could not focus. I literally felt like I was going to explode with pure rage when forced to do homework or buckle down. To this day, I do not know the reason.

But anyway, he and Cliona alike were very good at buckling down. That pissed me off. Cliona was my best friend, so it subsided over time and I learned how to deal. Mainly by calling her a nerd. But James, he was not a friend, just an acquaintance and I just hated him. Just because he was SO committed to school and learning and all of that. Again, I don’t know why.

So, I opened a few papers over the past few weeks and who am I seeing plastered all over the fucking place only James. It seems all that studying paid off and he is now the youngest ever person to be elected to some political party or council in Ireland. Again, I feel nothing but anger towards him. Anger that it is him and not me. Not that I wanted to be in politics, but I wanted to be SOMEWHERE. You know?

I know that he deserves it. I know that he worked towards it. I know that I could have had more were it not for my choices… but it still sucks.

Thats all I have for right now. I am just bitching about nothing I guess.

🙂