William Worman

i have internet sooner than i expected… however this is not the entry i wanted to write.

first off, thank you all for such wonderful notes.  i didn’t think i’d be back till friday.  it meant a lot to come back to that.

my mom texted me during the day and said i needed to call her when i got home, so, thinking i was supposed to call her at work, i left her a message to call me back when she didn’t answer at her desk.  finally about 7:30pm EST, my mom calls me asking where i had been?  i said at home.  i told her i called her work and was waiting for her to call me back and asked if she had gone home early cause she was sick or something.

she said no, and that there had been an accident.  i’ll be perfectly honest, i wasn’t really paying attention.  i had got a new game for the xbox and was playing it and having quite a big of fun…  the next words out of her mouth, in retrospect, didn’t sound real.

"Uncle Bud was killed in a motorcycle accident."

– silence –

i turned sideways and looked around my room as if looking around would mean that i had mis-heard her.  i almost asked her if she was joking.  and then it hit me…  we sat in silence on the phone for a few moments and tears streamed down my face.  i asked what happened and she told me.

the accident happened on monday, but no one knew until tuesday.  some people found him and he was flown to Stanford hospital and somehow they ran across records that had my other Uncle’s (Ram) information in Utah.  so police in Utah went to Ram’s house and told him what happened.  he immediately called everyone else (the other 5 siblings including my mom) and Bud’s gf, Irene.

since then i’ve been trying to keep my mind on other things, and i’ve been avoiding this all day.

Bud was the one i stayed with when i rode my motorcycle down to Santa Barbara.  i spent two weeks staying with him and we rode all over the hills outside of San Francisco together.  he helped me to be more cofident on my bike when riding.  i don’t understand how this could have happened…

i’ve lost a good deal of relatives in my life, but all were older, or had been sick like my aunt this summer.  none of them have been sudden and unexpected before.  and of all the people in the world, it couldn’t have happened to a gentler and kinder soul.  why couldn’t it have been me?!  he had a wonderfully loving girlfriend that we all loved, and son that just turned 20.  he was doing well in his career as a master mechanic with Mercedes.  i’ve lived a good life, i’m happy with what i’ve done and besides my immediate family i have nothing really tying me to this world.  i don’t understand…

i love you Bud, with all my heart, and i will miss you so much. 

William Worman, 1962-2009