… and i said, ‘could be fun?’
Basics
1. Name: Noah
2. Male/Female: *looks in pants* nope, still male
3. How old are you? 25
4. What country or state do you live in? Seattle, WA
5. Would you say you’re straight, gay or bi? i’m flaming, metrosexual (if fat people can be metrosexual) feminine straight… with previous bi thoughts… er… ?
Your Body
6. Describe what you look like physically? do i have to? i look like a line-backer but tubby around the edges… big hands, 5’11", brown hair, red beard (no i don’t dye it), green eyes. um… what else would you like to know? i’m a tubby bitch yo! lol
7. Ok now guys, how big is it honestly? tic-tac size…
8. And if u haven’t told us already girls, what size r ur tits, and guys, r u cut or uncut? cut… not sure why actually. i’m not exactly religious. not that i’m complaining, suits me just fine (that was far more than this question asked for…
9. and how big r ur nipples? tiny actually…
10. what’s ur fav part of ur body? my calves. all muscle, no fat. kind of sexy i’m told.
11. What’s ur fav body part on the other sex? face. if i had to pick something else, stomach (or, the part where the hip meets the pelvis… *shudders*)
12. What’s ur fav place on ur body 2 be kissed? lips… but i have a couple other hot spots.
13. Do u have any special names 4 ur<s
pan style=”COLOR: white; FONT-FAMILY: "Palatino Linotype"; mso-bidi-font-family: Tahoma”> privates or what do u call them? um… stumpy?
14. Do u shave ur pubic hair, trim, wax, have a racing strip, leave it natural or what? trim.
GETTING PERSONAL NOW (like it wasn’t before)
16. How often do u masturbate? well… i would say i attempt it at least once a month, then go "oh yeah… stupid."
17. How many ppl have u slept with? oh crap… lets see, (no its not a huge number, its just whether or not i want to remember a few… lol) 6
18. How old were u when u lost ur virginity? *hangs head* 21
20. Do u regret ur first time? no
21. Do u have any other sexual regrets? um… no
22. Have u ever had sex with a virgin? yes… 🙁 not something i’ll repeat if i can help it.
23. What has been the largest age difference between you and your sexual partner? 4 yrs (i was the older…)
24. How often would u have sex in an ideal relationship? at least 3-4 times a week. however, if you change the question to how often would i give oral, or please my partner, everyday if possible.
25. And when was the last time u actually did have sex? *coughtuesdaycough*
28. What sort of contraception do u normally use? the love glove… (i can’t believe i actually called it that *smacks forehead*
29. Have u ever had phone sex? yes…..
30. Have u ever had cyber sex? yes….. (hey, when you go for 4 years, you take what you can get…)
31. Have u ever devoted a whole day 2 sex? yes, it was fabulous
33. Do u prefer 2 give or receive oral sex? give… receiving is nice and all, but i seriously don’t get anything out of it (see 3 entries ago)
34. Do u prefer oral sex or normal sex? see question 24
35. Do u prefer giving/receiving blowjobs or handjobs? *shrugs* um… neither? both, i don’t really care?
36. Do u prefer eating/being eaten or fingering/being fingered? both at the same time seems to warrent the best reactions. but i’m flexible
37. Girls, have u ever used ur tits 2 get a guy off, or guys, have u ever had a girl use her tits 2 get u off? no
38. What’s ur fav position? all of them? (although, i do enjoy being on bottom)
39. What’s the most number of positions u’ve used in 1 sex session? too many to count?
40. Do u like sex best rough, gentle, fast, slow, or how? all of the above?
41. Do u get turned on by pain? some pain… i can’t say i’m into whips and chains, but biting or a little spanking is fun. (which reminds me of, "Sticks and stone may break my bones but whips and chains excite me." i love that…)
42. Have u ever tried anal sex and if so did u like it? i haven’t… i have a partner that’s into it, and i just haven’t brought myself to do it…
43. How do u feel about sex when u or ur partner is on her period? fine with me. sex is sex. a little blood never hurt anyone.
<stron
g>45. What’s the most number of orgasms u have had together, or in one sex session? oh good lord… my ex, i lost count after 17 (i’ve never had more than one or two…)
ORGASMS AND CUM
46. Can u cum from just having sex? usually its the only way. i need her pleasure to get me off…
47. What sort of orgasm do u normally have (do u moan, pant, gasp, scream or what)? hmm… i don’t know. i guess i pant and moan a little. i’m kind of quiet i think.
49. Girls, do u like the taste of cum, or guys, do u like the taste of pussy? very much so! (at least… fresh. *shudders*)
50. Have u ever tasted ur own love juices? i guess, after getting a blowjob and kissing her. never really noticed.
51. What did u think of the taste? its fine. (i loved hopefuls comment about not marinating chicken in it… priceless!)
53. Have u or do u ever look at porno magazines? i have before…
54. Have u or do u ever watch porno videos? meh… i used to when i was teenager, hungry for sex…
55. Have u ever watched a live stripper? can’t say i have
56. Have u ever watched a live sex show? nope
57. Have u ever used toys during sex? come to think of it, i haven’t
58. Have u ever used sex toys on ur own? no…
59. Have u ever used another object that wasn’t really a toy during sex? nope
61. How do u feel about talking during sex? dirty? of course. i have some good stories about that actually.
MOSTLY HAVE U EVERS
60. Have u ever used another object that wasn’t really a toy on ur own? nope
62. R u usually loud during sex? no
63. Have u ever woken up somebody else in the same house when ur having sex? um… i don’t think so. in the past it becomes a game to see if you came make the other person moan out loud though.
64. Have u ever had complaints from the neighbours about ur noise during sex? i don’t think anyone was complaining about it…
65. Have u ever been given open praise 4 ur sexual technique? yes, i guess my oral is better than most. but thats just because i take my time. its not some secret technique…
63. Have u or do u ever think about other ppl when ur having sex? i have… *ashamed* some of my recent partners (not that i didn’t like them) just didn’t turn me on like i thought they might.
67. Have u ever called out someone else’s name during sex? nope. although, i’ve been worried about it…
LOTS OF HAVE U EVERS
68. Have u ever had sex in a car? yes… many many times.
69. If yes, was the car moving? once…
70. Have u ever had sex in the water (pool, ocean, etc.)? no… i’ve heard that a water environment can be bad for the woman, however i have no idea if thats try (and doesn’t mean i don’t want to try)
71. Have u ever had sex in the shower? yes… talk about death-defying. sheesh… you could get killed doing that.
72. What’s the stra
ngest place u ever had sex? um… i have to pick one? my ex’s mother’s hallway, the bathroom backstage during and opera performance (thats a good story).
73. Have u ever had sex at work or school? technically yes, cause opera is my work (see above)
74. Do u ever roleplay in the bedroom (i don’t mean online)? i haven’t actually…
75. Have u ever used food 4 sexual purposes? *smiles* maybe…
76. Have u ever had a 3some or any sort of group sex? my ex wanted to have our roommate (very hot blonde and her best friend) join us, but she was never able to convince her to…
77. Have u ever had sex with more than 1 person during a 24-hour period but not at the same time? um. no
78. Have u ever had sex with other ppl in the room? yes… lol
79. Have u ever been caught masturbating? um… see above question about masturbating
80. Have u ever caught anyone else masturbating? i think so, but they played it off well.
81. Have u ever been caught having sex? technically no. at least, i dont’ think the person realised we were having sex. i think he just thought she was naked on top of me, (first naked woman he ever saw… lol)
82. Have u ever caught anyone else having sex? oh yes… its always funny to see how other people react in that situation.
83. Have u ever watched anyone masturbate (whether they knew or not)? yes, my ex, and she knew
84. Have u ever let anyone watch u masturbate? see question 83
85. Have u ever watched anyone have sex (whether they knew or not)? yes… my ex and i watched a couple go at it early one morning in the next apartment over. we both lived on the 3rd floor. probably the only reason we could see…
86. Has anyone ever watched u having sex? yes… aforementioned roommate
87. Have u ever watched urself? nope… (i hate to see me in the mirror, what the hell would convince me to record my fat ass…)
88. Have u ever kissed anyone of the same sex? yes… several times actually… actually many of my male friends and i kiss as we meet, or part ways, something wrong with that? (its actually an arts community thing…) not sensual kissing though
89. Have u ever had a sexual experience with someone of the same sex? no… i wonder if i’d like it…
90. Have u ever had sex with 2 ppl in the same family? nope
91. Have u ever had sex with someone related 2 u? um… ew…
92. Have u ever had sex with an animal? does it count if they were in the room watching?
93. Have u ever had pains as a result of sexual acts? oh yeah… i’ve been fucked raw… (my ex liked sex alot… trust me though, i’m not complaining)
94. Have u ever fallen asleep during sex? once… she told me she still got off… (note to self, never work 16 hrs then go home to a horny gf… lol)
95. Have u ever answered the phone while u were having sex and kept going? actually… my best friend was moving back to connecticut and the movers were there. she called my room at my grandmas, and my ex and i were having sex. i answered the phone cause i knew she was going to call, and was going to tell her i’d call he right back. well, she kept talking and talking, so i starting fucking again and pretty soon maija moaned right next to the phone… the following conversation went as thus:
"are you have *stress this word ALOT* SEX?!?!?!?! Call me when you’re done!"
96. Have u ever broken anything having sex? no…
97. Describe ur worst sexual experience? the virgin. *sigh*
98. Describe ur best sexual experience? too many to just name one…