Im not weak, you’ll know the same pain i did

Ive changed….like a lot, i dont like getting pushed around like i once did, im louder, prouder, and stronger than ive ever been

Nini, my ex, the one who caused me so much pain the last 2 years, he used me, he manipulated my feelings, he tricked me into sex, all get what he wants, and everytime i wanted to get away from that, he managed to convince me to do it again….not this time

a few months ago i told him we couldnt be friends anymore…..well time went by and now we are again, or so he thinks

you will know my pain….

everything happened so suddenly,  all of a sudden, we’re fkin fuck buddies again(with him theres always so much fkin sexual tension)

this time it was different though…..im so detached from him, its purely just sex now….but….i seem to have the power now….i dunno what it was, but it felt so good, not the sex……he seems to be in a rlly vulnerable place, he didnt wanna have sex, he wanted to CUDDLE, wow, those words from him are just……so weird, that wasnt like him……my friend says its a shift in power, im enjoying the shift in power because, now, im in control of him, and now i get to manipulate him…..i think this was my subconscious revenge…because i didnt rlly know i was doing that….all i knew is that i didnt give 2 fucks about how he felt,

know my pain bitch, know the pain u gave me, the pain u gave me when u said those 4 words, know the pain u gave me when u used my feelings so u could get off, im not the weak little bitch anymore

i did feel bad when i realized it though, but i felt bad that i didnt care…

it made me think, is this the person ive become? this cynical son of a bitch?

i guess its just towards him….i just want him out of my life dude, just out, unfortunately we have the same friends, and luckily i havent seen nini in about 3 weeks, so dats good