Almost forgot it was a holiday

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me – Philippians 4:13

I was woken up this morning by a text message on Mark’s phone.  It was 9 a.m. and I was some what awake already.  It was his friend inviting everyone over to his pool and for a beer drinking Memorial Day cook out.  We couldn’t go because Mark had to work 2:30-10:30pm and that made me sad that I didn’t have my own friends here.  No beer drinking or food on the grill for me today.  It wasn’t a good feeling.  I miss friends.

So when Mark left, I got my act together and went to the pool.  I love that our new apartment complex has one.  There was an older couple, later I learned they were 40 and 45, and they were also sitting poolside drinking beer.  Ahhh I was envious.  I even texted Mark and told him.  Two girls showed up later and I wanted badly to spark a conversation and hope we become BFF.  But they had each other to talk to and didn’t pay me any mind.  Later a bunch of kids came and the older couple set up the volley ball net and started a game, so I hoped in and joined.  It was fun.  I suck though, but the kids were like around age 10 and they were terrible too.  We all introduced ourselves to each other and the game made for a few good laughs.  I needed that.  It boosted my spirits a bit.  Finally one kid, who asked we call him Leonardo DaVinci, said he was tired and asked for a break.  I was happy since the game was going no where.  We didn’t even keep score. 

I was hoping to become BFF with the older couple too, even though they were twice my age and they probably thought I was younger than that.  I wanted to kick back and drink a beer with them.  They seemed like cool people, but besides exchanging names, a bunch of jokes and laughs in the pool, that was it.  Around 4 it got cloudy, I said bye and left.

I went home, feeling somewhat sad for myself and made some pasta for dinner.  Mark works evenings and since we can never have dinner together, I usually just find whatever I can scrounge up and don’t cook much for just myself.  I’m going to change that though.  I’m going to start making feasts for myself.  This is a chance for me to work on my cooking skills. 

After I ate some pasta in olive oil, fresh basil from my little herb garden, cherry tomatoes and chicken left over from the other day, I plopped on the couch for a good while.  I wanted to run but I knew I was too full and had to get out of the house.  So I decided to go to TJ Maxx and shop for a little bit.  You would think I had a job or something.  I didn’t find much.  Just a pair of capri jeans.  It’s hard being as little as I am.  I never can find clothes that fit and I always have to shop in the juniors section. 

Then to Walmart and got some food.  I’m going to make myself some little pizzas tomorrow and perogies and sausage another day.  I wanted to make spinach and artichok dip too, but I bought all the cheese and forgot the spinach and artochok, figures.  My mind must be somewhere else. 

While leaving Walmart I remembered 100 other things I needed but forgot.  Like ice cube trays to freeze my herbs and sun block and fill my Rx.  Geez.  That’s why I went to Walmart too, instead of the grocery store.  Guess I’ll have to go back again.  You’d seriously think I had a job or something.  Who knew money grew on trees.

Now I’m home.  I finally showered and am sitting on the couch in my bathrobe with a glass of chardonay.  Mark will be home in 30 minutes and then I can finally talk to someone today.  It sucks being alone all day.  I think I’m losing my mind, seriously.  And sometimes I find myself talking to myself!  Totally crazy.  Like I’ll be thinking of something in my head, anything, and all of a sudden I start saying my thoughts outloud and then I think, did I really say that outloud??  I think these are the first signs of pure craziness.  I need to get out of the house more.  I need friends in this damn area and hopefully when I get a job it will help me meet people. 

I have a BIG interview on Thursday.  Stay tuned.  I’ll write about it tomorrow.  But just for a preview, it’s to be a newspaper reporter. 

I’m going to look at the TV now and enjoy my wine.  Good night.