above town

 love. 
Now a worn road. 
No yellow. 
Black and grey
Oiled and warm..
I miss the feeling of loving someone 
Not necessarily being loved back..
Just loving
 
The wind was cool
The stars soaring past above us. 
All lights cast ten times as bright
Everyones movements were slurred
Like speech
I got lost in a haze
The stale air biting the buzz
My eyes open to too much sun
Damp skin
Covers tossed over just to shield a view
Window open above town
Green eyes that were supposed to be brown
Always waking before I,
And a smile to show his teeth
Clever mouth dry. 
I could have said things I would regret
I didn’t. 
I’m careful and collected 
And for some reason, I wanted him to ask

I feel myself shaking
 I’m on edge all the time
I want to be held.
Right now.
But I don’t know why. 
And he would kiss my forehead that way he does. 
And I would smile.