Same song..

 Of course I’m not going to meet Gabe. He will be in town next week, and I have not continued my communication with him. I just wanted to know that I could, and I wanted Chris to know that I could. I dropped it after that night, and Gabe is still a thing of the past. Then a few days ago, I randomly got a text from the guy I was dating just before I met Chris, almost exactly 2 years ago. I ended it, then wanted to take it back, but ultimately I am glad I followed my gut. He was was an alright person, but he was bad news.

Turns out he got married a year ago, and is getting divorced this week. I guess he wanted to see if I was still available, for whatever reason. I have no interest in seeing him again, but I wished him well. I thought it was strange timing, with all the ex business going on. 

I couldn’t deal with Chris last night. I came home to him playing his video games. He said they just started a game, it would be a half hour. I rolled my eyes, a half hour is 3 hours in video game world. So I went to bed, and he didn’t go to work today.

So I did something this morning that I haven’t done in years. I put my laptop in my backpack, with my phone and A&P text book, and headed to Starbucks. Ordered my large coffee, veggie breakfast sandwich, while Beck’s "Girl" played in the background. It’s pumpkin spice latte time, but it’s also get rid of the belly time, so I settled for a plain coffee, which I normally do. I don’t know what’s so comforting to me about being here again. It was so awkward for me the first time I brought my laptop into Starbucks, to be one of those people.

But this morning I took a quick shower, slipped on my lazy shoes and headed right now for my big coffee. Chris still asleep on the couch. The cold is definitely in the air this week, and though I am grateful to have a home and lots of love waiting for me (even when distracted by video games), I don’t want to be there right now. I’m going to sit here until my battery dies, and then find a movie. Maybe even put in that old Beck cd that I probably still have in my old car visor cd case, now thrown in the backseat. 

Time to dig that back out, after homework and a movie. The way it used to be in my single days. I guess I have also been thinking a lot, after seeing the movie "Enough Said", the other day. The things we can tolerate about another person, and the things we can’t. The little annoyances that will drive us away, down the road. It’s all staring at me in the face right now, I know everything that will eventually drive me crazy. The question is what can I live with, and what will I eventually run from and be relieved to never have to deal with again. 

I know that I hate those video games, almost as much as him jerking off to his ex. Some things I just don’t know if I can learn to accept.