Alex has a doctor’s appointment
Note: I had this on private, and have made it public. There is an update in two entries.
Grrrr.
Am I making something out of nothing? Alex, her eye jiggles rapidly, especially when she’s tired. I never noticed it, but now two people have pointed it out, and I can see it now that they pointed it out. Plus, she’s STILL not sitting up, not well. She doesn’t roll over, though I have seen her do it. What the heck is UP with these muscle control issues? The eye freaks me out a lot, because I had eye issues, still do really, though it’s not something that tends to impede my life overly much. I am quite functional despite being functionally blind out of one eye…which means I can see out of it, but fat lot of good it does me…can’t read with it, can only recognize large shapes and it’s got good periperhal vision, so that’s helpful. I made Jerry make a dr’s appointment for her. I think it’s just better to be proactive NOW, and get any issues she might have dealt with. I try to balance what she can’t do with what she can… hold her own bottle, she babbles. Heck, I was trying to get Sammi to say Barney the other night, when Alex started saying bbbbbbb, lol. I was doing the same thing to Sammi. B…Barney. B….Barney. Sammi, look at me, B, b, b, Barney. She wouldn’t do it, but Alex tried to copy the sound, and did a fair job of it too. Jerry says it’s because she doesn’t get enough exercise, and I just think, wrong. She sits in her chair every day now, sometimes upwards of an hour. She tends to list forward though, and Jane, who’s children have had therapy for this type of thing, says that’s not good… though it IS after 5 minutes or so of sitting up, so it’s as she starts to tire. I just really don’t know, and I’m trying not to go into full blown panic mode, but she really, REALLY should be sitting up now, and I would think actively rolling over, and trying to crawl. She gets quite a bit of tummy time these days too. Well, to ME… Jerry (who isn’t even HERE for it anyway!) doesn’t think she does. BAH on him. He doesn’t even KNOW, and I really feel very irritate that he would make such assumptions. Hell, I can’t come into the same room with her when someone else is holding her without her starting to whine. THAT is how attached to ME she is. Even her daddy gets that reaction, so it’s not just because she doesn’t feel safe in the girl’s arms. She is a mama’s girl, through and through. It feeds my ego, but that doesn’t mean it’s healthy. I just can’t help but wonder if she does that because he simply doesn’t hold her as much as I do. Or even play with her as much as I do. Well, I guess he wouldn’t anyway, but I can’t help but feel he COULD be more involved. He probably feels like I’m to blame for that. But then, it doesn’t help that she always wants me anyway, so I’ll give her to him, sit down next to them, and she’s leaning over trying to get back to me. If he turns her so she can’t see me, she turns her head so she CAN. Honestly, even though she seems to have the muscle control issues, she seems very bright and intelligent despite.
Okay, did some research, and the eye jiggle has a name! It MAY be Nystagmus. I’m going to have to get her into the eye doctor, obviously. I’ll have the doctor have a look, but I am SURE this needs to be look at by a specialist. The more I read, the less I am worried about it, because I know she can see, and it MAY lead to later problems, it may not. There’s no use in worrying about that, truthfully. There’s NOTHING I’ll be able to do about it if that’s what she has. It’s not correctable, but babies who are born with it have the fewest problems adjusting to it. So there you go. So, tomorrow will bring about a visit with her doctor, a call to an eye doctor who can handle babies, and I’ll have to see if they’ve ever seen a case of Nystagmus. What a name that is. I can’t remember what MY eye problem is called, but it had a name too. Actually, I had lazy eye, where the eye turned inwards. She can have issues like that at times, but it’s not constant. We may have to do some exercises with her, and if she does have lazy eye, she may need surgery, as I did. It seems my genes (and Jerry’s too!) have caught up with me. Maybe. At this point, all I can do is get her into the eye doctor, and not worry. Though I wonder if the two are related somehow? Well, I guess we’ll find out, won’t we? Eye jiggle can be a nervous system disorder… hm.
GAH… Jerry still thinks I’m making more of this than is necessary! But, he says, he’s not a doctor. Hey… mom’s intuition here! There is SOMETHING WRONG. She is getting plenty of exercise.
Okay, not going over that again. I may not be doing ALL I can, but I sure as heck am doing something. And it should be enough. It was enough for Shabree and Sammi. Jerry thinks all I do all day is lay around breast feeding her, and because of that, she won’t try for anything else.
I know I shouldn’t worry, but all of it combined… it just screams problem to me. So WHY should I ignore it and let her go on getting no help whatsoever? Why not get her the best chance to get therapy, or whatever she may need to deal with it, sooner rather than later?
She doesn’t seem all THAT laid back to me, when I think about it. I mean, she can be particularly demanding and agreesive when it comes to feeding. She will take her spoon away from me to feed herself, she takes my breast and rams it in her mouth, and when she pops off, she usually still has the nipple in her mouth, like she’s going to get EVERY last drop there is (and that HURTS, oh my God.) She slaps me while she feeds, arches her back shoving herself up-I have to drag her back down to get her latched properly. She cries and whines when she can’t have something she wants. And she WILL try to get at something she wants, and gets very frustrated when she can’t do it. That’s NOT laid back behavior, that is a kid who is dealing with pure frustration. I was enticing her to crawl tonight with ice cream… and she knows what ice cream is, and she loves it. And when she couldn’t get her body to go get the ice cream, she got pretty upset. She can get her back up off the ground, but can’t get her legs up underneath her, not even with help. She SEEMS strong, but something… is missing. And there’s the odd mix of having the fine motor skill of holding her bottle. Yea, it’s weird.
I told Jerry I’d at LEAST like to get her some physical or occupational therapy to get her to where she should be, and he agreed with that. Good. I mean, I feel like I’m kind of having to fight for my right to be a concerned mom. Just the more I think about it, the more I realize that even if she’s a bit behind, let’s get her caught up. One odd little thing for me is that if she has a problem, I hope it’s more physical than mental. I also hope it is mild. It would APPEAR so, because for the m
ost part, she is sitting. But, what do I know? I don’t mean to be semi hysterical about it…but then, I’ve read too many stories where moms where just told to "wait and see" and if they’d gotten help for their kid when the problem first appeared, they would have gotten the help they needed, and there might not even BE a problem left to deal with. It helps a LOT to get early intervention, the sooner the better.
Well… hm. Okay, doing some additional research, her sitting may be normal. GAH…. I mean doggone it, am I making this into a big mountain, or not? Heck with it, I’m making this private… I’m probably being silly. Hope I am.
