3/28/08

I’m having a baby shower! Please visit:

http://www.webbabyshower.com/mullen/

I began to read the passage in the Book of Mormon that the boys (whose names are Casey and Benjamin), actually it was Ben who said to read this particular passage, would shed light on why we go through the human experience.  It didn’t.  AND, that book, I did not realize, is rather "old testament" and so deals with the coming of Christ, not with Christ who came.  I need to do some meditation on WHY I’m supposed to read the Bible.  I mean, I have some deep, DEEP questions about being human, and the power of creation, and exactly in WHAT portion of God’s image were we made?  Is God in some way human?  I’ve got serious doubts about THAT one, or it would not be said that no one has ever looked upon God.  My educated guess is that we were made in God’s spiritual image.  But that STILL begs the question of WHY BE human?  WHY do we go through this experience, what does it do for us, what is the point?  Because the way I figure/see it. there MUST be a point, a reason God has, or maybe WE have, for getting born, going through happiness AND pain, for doing all that we do.  And obviously, it’s not so we can take it with us when we die, cause that isn’t happening.  Well, except that maybe we DO take something with us when we die.  Do we take our life’s experiences with us?  Do we take everything we’ve learned?  Do we take our spirituality, our knowingness of God?  The music we’ve learned?  The loves we’ve had and lost?  It would SEEM that we do.  Obviously, we don’t take the money, the cars, the jobs, the houses, the jewelry… we don’t take the physical stuff.  I think we get to keep the emotional stuff and the spiritual stuff, and all the physical stuff goes bye bye.  Which is probably why the Book of  John says Don’t love the world or anything in it.   Why bother?  Why get attached to that STUFF, when you leave it all behind anyway.  Sure, it’s nice to have something to give your kids and your grandkids (and if you’re REALLY lucky, your great grandkids!)  But ultimately, that isn’t what it’s about, is it?
However, that’s all the sort of "been there done that" stuff for me… that is the OBVIOUS stuff.  What I have really recently been having a focus on, been seriously thinking about, is us.  Human beings.  Martin Luthor King Jr said,
"We are not afraid of being powerless.  We are afraid of being powerful beyond measure."  How true that is.  Because if you could think into existence 1 million dollars, would you do it?  You probably wouldn’t… because that KIND of money inspires fear.  It really does.  But really, humans CAN make 1 million dollars, and most of us actually do see that kind of money in a lifetime.  Hell, we saw it in a year.  It’s gone now.  The thing is… that humans are capable of incredible things that we never let ourselves just DO.  Think about this for a second… if God could make the world in 6 days…with a day for rest… and we were made in THAT image… then really, what EXACTLY stops us from creating something like that?  Disbelief that it’s possible for one thing.  Fear, probably for another.  But I do believe that we are probably capable of much more than we ever give ourselves credit for.  One thing I did wrestle with for a bit was does God really exist, or are WE really God?  That question is going to get me into trouble… LOL.  For myself, I decided that I’d felt God’s love too many times, felt God "Himself" (itself?  God is Male in my existence, but I often wonder if that’s from training and expectation more than that’s what God really IS.)  to really and truly doubt the existence of God.  Still… there is much that I feel we are capable of, that we’re just not allowing ourselves to do… to HAVE.  Because of course, part of the problem is, in the words of Spiderman …."With great power comes great responsibility"  and perhaps we simply DON’T WANT that kind of responsibility!   And… I wonder about the portion of evil… what sorts of bad things could be wrought with that kind of power.  But the fact is, that most humans, with good or evil intent, aren’t going to truly want that kind of creationist power…  I don’t think.  Well, for the time being, they’re not going to believe that they’ve even got it in them.  We are all limited by our beliefs, which seem to be, by the nature of humans at this point in evolution… limiting.  LOL… what you might call a vicious circle, yes? 
So I’m going to circle back around to wanting to know WHY I’m supposed to read the Bible.  Because God definitely said to me I’d find some answers in there.  Now ONE thing, I did stumble across today in the Book Of Mormon, which I had kind of an "aha" moment, was a line that said to the effect (and if anyone wants the exact place and quote, I’ll get it for you, otherwise, you’ll have to be content with my paraphrase) "Everything happens for God in one day.  Time is made for man."  Now when I was married to Gregg, he used to channel a being, actually, he channeled two or three, and I cannot remember who it was who told us, Time is a man made construct.  And I don’t know if he told us, or if I surmised on my own… I want to say I surmised on my own, that time brings order to the chaos that life would be if order wasn’t put to it.  It’s our way of knowing when and why things occurred.  Otherwise, it would be a jumble we wouldn’t understand.  I have to assume that God is able to order it without the construct of time. 

Okay, Linda just called me, and I really want to talk to her, so I am going to "finish" here and I’ll pick up later, when I am thinking about it again.