Reciprocal Focus Contact Lens

In which our Hero wonders why it is that the easiest things are the easiest to neglect

I am sucking at the contact thing. I can think of various people I need to reach out to, I think of emailing them, and calling them, it’s in my head to do it, but I don’t. And it’s not neglect, benign or otherwise, and while it may show as a lack of regard, it’s rather quite the opposite. I feel like I need to write something good, or long, or profound, and I don’t have the moment, or the energy, or the still heart.

I just realized the still heart, the no mind thing. I just realized that, holy crap, that’s the answer right there.

The question is, How do I contact my loved ones when contacting them demands *more* time, and higher quality time. How do I fit them in? I keep trying use the pauses productively and reply then. Which is good for conversational stuff but lousy for deeper emotional things. And I wondered why it’s okay to let friends and family suffer in that regard, except that I answered that long ago as contrary to the goal. And now I wonder why I fail, why I keep pausing and then thinking that I will answer this at home, at work, on the bus, wherever, and never quite get around to it.

And there’s the answer. No mind. It’s not just the answer to the email, it’s the answer to everything, to my difficulties at work, to my stress, to how to talk to people and who. Ha. I’m having an inarticulate epiphany. And the worst part is that it’s an epiphany that resonates to a Tom Cruise movie. Though I tell myself it’s a Ken Watanabe movie because then it seems so much more dignified. “The Last Samurai,” a cheese filled bombastic imposition of western sensibilities onto eastern history (which thus works since it documents the bombastic imposition of western sensibilities onto eastern history) covers the transition of the Empire of Japan from samurai culture to salaryman. It’s very beautiful to me, visually and spiritually.

At one point a samurai warrior is trying to teach Tom Cruise how to fight and they have this conversation about mindset. The warrior’s guidance is two words: “No Mind.” And Cruise goes, over the course of the movie, from having a great deal on his mind to understanding how to just be, in the moment.

So, to try to explain my insight, the answer for me is also no-mind. To forget about a good time or a bad time to reply and instead spend a moment to just be, with the friend I want to touch, before I ever say a word.

(laugh)

Pay me no mind.