Fish and Chips, eventually *

In which our Hero has one of the odder lunch experiences and wonders if it needs more description than was already in the conversations around it

“Well, it’s 12:10 and I’ve got a 1 o’clock meeting so whatever we do for lunch needs to be fast, guys.”

“Well, we already did fast food twice this week, what do you suggest?”

“Stupid pho?” I proposed.

“Done,” the other two agreed.

“Oh crap, they’re full and people are waiting,” I said.

“Plan B?” Hollywood said.

“How about the wing place a few doors down?”

“Can I take your orders?” said the waitress.

“Fish and chips, and [beer]. We’re in a hurry, if you can help at all.”

“Fish and chips, and [beer], please”

“Fish and chips and a 7-up,” I ordered. Didn’t want to head straight to the meeting enbeered.

“Here’s your food,” said the waitress. “Do you need cutlery?”

“Yes,” said our third to her. After she’d left, “Do people normally eat big fish filets with their hands?”

I’d been centering condiments and only then discovered, “Hey I have no lemon!”

“I’ve got two, but I already squeezed out both,” said Hollywood, helpfully.

“Can I get a slice of lemon, please?” I asked.

“You didn’t get one?” the waitress seemed embarrassed, as she dispensed forks.

“Also can we get napkins?”

“Here you go,” said the waitress, stopping on her way to another table.

“Aw man,” I complained to my group, “these are cocktail slices, they’re a pain to squeeze.”

“At least you have lemon now.”

“And wet fingers. Wonder if she’ll remember the napkins”

“Is everything okay?” the waitress asked.

“Yes,” we told her. “Just need the napkins, and also, would you mind changing the channel because it’s a little odd to be watching a blood-and-guts horror movie over lunchtime food.”

The waitress looked over at the big screen in the corner and blanched.

*Edit*

The waitress got us our food quickly and even with the “horror show” got us out with plenty of time to get back before my meeting. We tipped her as normal, it just didn’t seem like a reason to hold things against her. Now, if only I could tip fully and deduct from the restaurant’s share.

Second, “Stupid Pho” is the second closest of 4 Pho-service restaurants we frequent. And the second worst of the four, but it’s cheap and fast and usually we get seated. Plus we’re VIPs and get a discount. Woo