Goodbye

I know that you and I have our ups & downs. But every fight and disagreement we have had I don’t regret at all. Because from each one I have learned what it takes to make you happy, which is what I want to do now and forever.

The last couple of days I have done nothing other than think & realize that I don’t want to be without you. You have changed me in so many ways. With you, I am able to be the person I am, but lost sight of. When I say I love you, I mean it in an ineffable way. When I say I am going to miss you more than you know, I mean it.

I know its only been almost two months, but these two months have been fervent. We have spent almost everyday together and me having the delight to know I can see you when I get home from work, and the joy of having you to wake up next to in the morning. And now knowing all of that is going to change after you leave is so hard for me. I don’t know how long I am going to be able to do this, especially considering that everything reminds me of you. I know you said “Distance is to love, as wind is to fire”, and I know that distance doesn’t matter when two people are loyal to one another. But still. I don’t want to be apart from you. I know I am probably making this harder and worse than what it is (my mind tells me) but my heart tells me the opposite, even as I am writing this now, tears fill my eyes. I’ve always been told to trust my heart because the heart understands what the head can not conceive. So that is what I am doing.

You have touched me in a way that I have never felt before and I don’t ever want to lose this feeling as long as we both live. You are and will forever be the only man I want. Even in my lowest moment I will always turn to you because you are the only one that can comfort me, nothing and no one else will suffice.

Just please be “patient” with me and my many calls of missing you, tears, and sadness from not being able to see you when I want to. And also that you forgive me for any mistakes I may make. My desire is to make you happy and to alleviate and remove any doubts or worries you may have with me or us.

When I tell you I love you, it’s because I know you will be my last and my only.

I love you more than I let you know…and it gets deeper everyday. I know being apart is going to be very difficult but you have assured me that you and I will be fine.

I’ll miss you.

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