The magnificent obsession

In the course of what little down time I have these days, I have been exploring some of my interests online. Which makes such searching far easier to do these days then when I was growing up. I think back to when I was a child, and really about the only place where one could do a really exhaustive search was of course the nearest public library. It was great once I was able to drive, because then I could stop by the library after school and have plenty of time to browse. When I was much younger, there was a book mobile that used to stop at the community center down the street from my grandmother’s house. She would walk me down there where both of us would peruse what was available and usually we would both come back with at least a couple of books. And a notable thing about that book mobile was that it was air conditioned. Which was most welcome and rather surprising, as many homes in those days lacked central air conditioning, including my grandmother’s. School libraries also had at least a few books to satisfy my interests.

Back in those days what piqued my curiosity the most was anything to do with cats, wolves, bears, and meat eating animals in general. The walls of my bedroom, much to my parents’ chagrin, was covered with all sorts of animal posters. And of course there were the books, as I had at least a few that actually belonged to me. This was one of my first huge obsessions, and one I am still very much into to this day. And I’ve expanded my interest into pretty much all kinds of animals, both living and prehistoric. Now my book shelves are filled to the brim with all sorts of volumes on these subjects.

That has been the story of my life with regards to various interests. Naturally, most everyone has something, some hobby or other pursuit that they devote time and money to. But for me, some of them tend to just appear out of the blue, so to speak. I have never really figured out why this is so, nor have I ever encountered anyone else whose mind seems to work this way. Ever since I can recall, on occasion I’d develop a particularly strong interest in some subject. In childhood, I would unintentionally drive my parents and anyone else I spent time around crazy in my zeal to discuss whatever subject might be on my mind. Unless of course that person also shared a love of that topic, which wasn’t very often. Some of these interests waxed and waned over time, while others, like the animals, have continued on. And I would never know when one might suddenly come into being, like earlier this year when the Key Bridge collapsed. I have no clue as to why this happens with some things and not others. The moment I saw that video of the Key Bridge tumbling into the Patapsco River something began to stir within my mind. This is not unlike when you hear a particular song you haven’t heard in a long time, and you find that song becomes “stuck” in your head for what seems like an excessive amount of time. It might be a song you like, or one you hate, but either way, you cannot get it out of your mind. But for most people, those fixations only last hours or maybe a couple of days. As previously noted, I never had a great opinion of the Key Bridge, but that didn’t matter. Suddenly I found that I had developed an insatiable curiosity about not only the Key Bridge, but also bridges in general. This wasn’t wholly unprecedented, as I had always enjoyed crossing the Bay Bridge, and that bridge in Savannah really caught my attention. In the past I have had at least some awe and appreciation for large, impressive bridges so this latent interest makes sense in some ways.

While I was growing up, these interests did create some problems, as they would end up dominating my thoughts. That never bothered me, but it was quite a nuisance to those with whom I spent time. As I grew older, I learned how to mostly keep these interests to myself, or only share them with like minded people. Luckily these days it is far easier to find such like minded people online, and also to indulge said interests. But there has been a positive side effect of sorts to these randomly appearing interests. The effect being that during the course of such explorations I have learned quite a lot. One time I was explaining something to my husband, and he looked at me with surprise, wondering how I knew so much about that particular subject. I really didn’t have much of an answer as to how I had acquired such knowledge, though. At least not one that would have made sense to him. I’ve had some other people make similar remarks, wondering how I have assumed such broad knowledge of so many topics and telling me I ought to go on Jeopardy.  I don’t know about that, as game shows aren’t my thing.  However, the very act of researching and studying a particular subject has also had the effect of dispelling any fears I might have had. Such as my fear of roller coasters. After I took that nightmarish ride on that looping coaster, I became obsessed with those rides and I had to get to the bottom of it, so to speak. In the course of that exploration I determined that my fears were unfounded, and it wasn’t long before I came to really enjoy such rides. And I still do to this day.