Could I face it?

Speaking of the malevolent monarch of all dreadful bloodstained monsters, that foreboding, fear inspiring mega structure of the south that is the Sunshine Skyway Bridge…. Sometimes I wonder what would happen if I was to wake up tomorrow and find myself in its neck of the woods. If I was nearby, close enough to see its towers looming over the landscape, what would I do? What if I was driving on the highway that it is a part of, heading right towards it? There’s pretty much no bridge out there that I would have any sort of misgivings about crossing, at least those in the developed world that are reasonably well maintained. But for every rule there is the exception. In some ways, being in such a situation might be rather like my encounter with the Key Bridge so long ago. This time it would not catch me by surprise, as I know where it is and would know how to avoid it if I so desired. However, if I ever find myself facing that beast and I accept that challenge to cross it, I might just be gripping the steering wheel hard and sweating bullets! Not from the Florida heat and humidity, but from existential dread and angst. It would be a heart pounding drive for sure! I know that one day I will go down there and look upon that creepy construction. I might need a little time to psych myself up to cross it, but I would still do it. I’d be incredibly nervous but that would not stop me from mastering that monster as I did not long ago with the New River Gorge Bridge. Like with the Key Bridge, I really don’t know what exactly I’d be afraid of. It doesn’t seem that there is anything intrinsically unsafe about the Skyway, especially since it was built with avoiding disaster in mind. In fact, the Bay Bridge has a whole lot more safety and structural issues. But a building where many people have died in horrible ways and is reputed to be haunted might be structurally sound, but that doesn’t mean you’d want to go in it! Well, OK, I’d probably still go in such a building, and I’m sure I would eventually cross the Tampa Bay monster if I was in its neighborhood. Though surely my skin would be crawling and my hair standing on end as I drove towards it…

The other day I noticed something odd when I was driving around town. I was at a stop sign, and I could have swore I spied an image of Maryland’s menacing metal monster, the Bay Bridge, on the license plate on the car in front of me. But the car sped away in a different direction than where I was headed and so I figured I hadn’t really got a good look and was mistaken. Then, yesterday, I read a news article and, come to find out, my eyes were not playing tricks on me. Yes, the state has indeed issued a new commemorative license plate with an image of our “scariest bridge” monster in the upper left corner. I saw another one of those plates today. So, West Virginia is putting an image of their iconic monster on their drivers licenses and Maryland is offering a license plate with their infamous monster on it. I wonder if Florida has a license plate with an image of their epic blood soaked concrete beast emblazoned upon it? And it’s surprising that California doesn’t have a plate that pays homage to that antique orange steel monstrosity that spans the Golden Gateway of death beneath it. Either way, I’m sure that anyone who is terrified of the Bay Bridge would be the last to want to purchase such a plate!

And then again, there are those who knew people who discarded their lives by jumping from the metal monster of the Chesapeake Bay. I cannot imagine that any one in that situation would want such a plate, or even have to see it on other vehicles.