Lawn Chair People

Joe rarely initiates couple activities for us, so when he does, I clear off my schedule, offer no excuses, and make myself available.

Our couple tradition has been to have a long and leisurely Sunday breakfast. I get up at 6:00 am on Sundays. I feed the dogs, make coffee, and then put on my exercise clothes, and head out the door to start my day right with a heart thumping cardio routine at the gym.

When I get home, I take a long hot shower, shave my legs and armpits, and then polish my nails while Joe cooks up a delightful morning spread of eggs, bacon, bagels, veggies, and fruit.

Well, the Sunday tradition was broken today when Joe suggested we go out for breakfast.

We rarely go out to eat. Since Joe had the shingles two years ago, the nerve damage has spread to his eyelid and right side of his forehead. Sometimes his eyelid fills up with blood, and it makes it difficult for him to see as it swells up so much that it droops over his eye. He doesn’t like to go out in public, although you don’t notice it, but he thinks people do.

But Joe has been working with a neurologist and a dermatologist and his eye and forehead have cleared up over the past month, and I think that has given him confidence about getting out in public.

He also has germ phobia, and thinks most restaurants are unsanitary places, along with the customers who might have colds and then cough and sneeze all over the food.

However, he suggested going out for breakfast, maybe because not only does he feel better, but also maybe he’s tired of cooking!

I did keep one part of our Sunday tradition, and that was to start my day at the gym and then take a long hot shower. I sure didn’t want to stink up the restaurant and I also didn’t want to miss working out my heart.

So we went to the restaurant after my shower. Before we walked in, Joe told me to try to get a booth kind of by ourselves (see, the germ phobia).

And lo and behold, the host gave us a nice both in the corner, so we only had to sit by one other couple. Totally private, and germ free, as neither person was hacking phlegm towards the food headed our way.

We drank coffee, ate our food, had good conversations, and read the paper. Joe even had a piece of apple pie.

Then we decided to go to the cemetery. Joe’s wife is also buried at Fort Snelling National Cemetery.

When we were first dating, we used to go to the cemetery together almost all the time, but now after almost five and a half years, we rarely go together anymore. I still go about once a week, whereas Joe goes less often.

But we’ve gone together the last two weeks so that’s been nice.

I really don’t like going to the cemetery on Sunday mornings, because a lot of people go there after church. It’s kind of crowded and some people are really annoying. But Joe and I were heading there at prime Sunday time for lots of people and there were.
But this time we saw a lot of “lawn chair people.” These are people who miss their loved ones so much that they bring out a lawn chair and sit by their graves for a while. You see them a lot when someone first dies, but you see them for loved ones who have been gone a while, too.

I’ve only done the “lawn chair” thing once – I think it was the first or second summer Ray was gone, and I drove from work to the cemetery to have lunch with him. I sat on my lawn chair at his grave and chowed down my lunch while reading the paper. He totally understood. And it was nice to do that with him.

I’ve gone to visit him when I’ve been upset about things, but never sat in a lawn chair. If it’s nice enough, I’ll sit on the ground.

But, today, on a cloudy and cool Sunday morning, we counted five people sitting on lawn chairs as we drove in.

I think the “lawn chair people” will be disappearing soon. We finally turned a corner away from our hot and dry summer. We had rain last night – a good soaking rain. I had almost an inch in my rain gauge this morning.

And it’s been cool and cloudy most of the day. Now in the late afternoon, the sun is just starting to come out. But it’s going to be cool the rest of this week, with just a quick two-day spike in the temp to the 80s before it cools back down to the 60s.

I’m definitely ready for fall. I’m wearing jeans and a sweatshirt. I baked bread this afternoon and have chili simmering in the crockpot. And I baked a chocolate cake for Joe and I to enjoy for dessert. I sure don’t feel like doing these activities on a hot summer day.