why the hell..

Time: 3:55 P.M. Eastern Time:
Mood: Wondering why
Music: Mercury Rising by FATA
Eating/Drinking: A banana [which I shouldnt have] and water.

Happiness never fucking lasts! I was so perky today and yesterday. Until today, like last period. Why the fuck does it never stay?! Everything’s going crazy! Everything’s messed up. I wish it was different!

Seriously, everything’s all perky, all hyper. Then it’s like, Whatever, see ya laters. I didn’t even hang out after school today cause I’m not even close to being in any mood to be with friends. I want to curl up in the corner. I say this every entry but it’s just on my mind every day and every time. Solitude is great. Just being left alone and not talked to. Who could complain? And to think, I was contemplating changing my layout to a brighter color. Yeah no way is that happening right now.

I’m going to North Carolina in a couple weeks. I can’t wait to get away. Though yeah, I’ll miss hanging out with people over the break but…wait a sec..We never hang out during breaks! Just realized this. We all say we will and everything, but we never do.

I’m gonna stop now…

-Saoirse

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</D< body bod<<<<

[Rage].

April 6, 2005

Hey, Awww, “huggzzzz”…i know how u feel about being alone in a conrner..sometimes being around people while ur totally in a different world…ur own..sucks big time..aww, sometimes we need to be seriously left alone..but things never happen the way we want them to, huh? Anyways sweetie i dont know what to tell u or adivcwe u..cause i know it wouldnt matter but be appreciated…just take care of

yourself..and dont matter what people say..and im sure there are people who love you, but are too crazed to admit it “hugz”…and me and joey are doin alright..didnt talk to him for a week, hed probably show today…and..im glad u liked the song..and reveals the way u excatly feel..”hugz”

StonedCaO

WHAT?! WHADDAYA MEAN WE NEVER HANG OUT DURING BREAKS?!?! its just that we never get a chance to… im offended… i had a game party during the winter break… i can swear that u were there… DDR!!! cheer up will ya… cant wait til summer… if anythings botherin ya… im always there jak

for every good thing that comes in life something bad follows. so every time something bad happens, smile the rough times will end soon and something thatll make u smile is coming your way. i gotta start believing on the things i say.

lol, yeah i remember that. make plans for the break, then don’t go. north carolina’s cool. it’s like almost south without all the hicks. i like it. why shouldn’t you have a banana? happiness comes in 5-second increments, capped off at some random number i haven’t figured out yet, but definietly not more than a few hours.

you say that you enjoy solitude but is that what you really want? I mean you might think your alright when you are alone but is it?