Something or another.. depressing
I have to get myself back together, start thinking things through.
I hate being emotional, I hate emotions and I feel that I would rather be better off without them. But I am human and that is the way the cookie crumbles.
Why do I bother sometimes? I just dont want to try anymore. Again the quandry that I dont know how to speak and react badly to situations.
Can I just lay down and die?
I keep shaking, keep crying and I dont know how to alleviate it. I talked to Blood today and well Domabee is stirring up trouble talking about things that I had said, granted I never knew some things but never details or anything of the sort.
Blood wants me to come back to AIT, part of me wants to appease him but another part wants just to avoid the whole situation. Walk away.
Feel like walking away no matter what. Too fucking stressful.
Things are as follows…
- Learn how to speak
- Learn to shut off the fucking emotions
- Get myself into the habit of working out again
- Forget the past & live for myself
When will I be good? When will I be okay?
When can I be something that I can be proud of?
Don’t shut off your emotions-that is not healthy. But do choose your words carefully if that is getting you into trouble with others. Don’t forget your past, because that is what has made you …you…but learn to forgive yourself for the things you don’t like. Working out…yeah, this is good…do it…just like Nike.
Warning Comment