Not Knowing…

Funny day today. It was one where I had nothing definite planned, but had to be able to take a telephone call at any time. This was because I had 24 students’ folders being externally assessed and there might be queries. I’ve heard nothing and it’s now 5.30.pm. Does this mean they’ve not been done yet or what?

I’ve not been able to settle properly to doing anything because 92 school/college points rests on each of these folders. A bad assessment could be a major and Titanic-proportion disaster (slight exaggeration, but I’m allowed). I’m still biting my fingernails, thinking of getting drunk into oblivion and needing to be told not to panic, not to stress and to calm down and take deep breaths. Or maybe I should indulge in wild and fulfilling sex. That’d take my mind off work things!

Then I got a phone call – I’ve lost one of my jobs. This is the tutor work on Friday mornings. Not through anything I’ve done, but simply because the local Alternative Education provision didn’t get enough students referred to run two schemes again. I’m now thinking that this may be the shape of things to come, because one of the others has only had 50% take up so far, too. There’s only one I know for sure is ok with numbers for next year.

I’m trying to tell myself that uncertainty is good for the soul and will keep me from getting complacent, but it’s not working too well…

Fingers, arms, legs and eyes all still remain crossed.

FallingDog

July 10, 2008

I’ll vote for sex over booze any time! I’m crossing fingers for you, too.

Adagio

Laughing at FallingDogs note…and keeping my hopes for you up there as well! :)xoxox

Maybe you didn’t hear anything about the students’ folders because they were all well up to standard? That’s a real pest about the drop in numbers; you certainly don’t want it to happen with any other of your potential classes. Crossing my fingers for you. (Do you mind if I skip the arm and leg-crossing? It rather gets in the way of walking etc!)RYN: Oh, you’d love the creative writing course! You’d be one of those wretched people whose work is so breathtakingly creative, funny and just plain good that it makes me want to curl up in a little embarrassed ball, like a slater, for daring to post my work on the same page as them. (Yes, a few of the group are incredible! It’s a joy to read them! Then there are others who are…. well …. not incredible. *grin*) But it’s certainly time-consuming. Maybe something to look forward to when you retire – and not for a few years yet, in spite of those dropping numbers!

Icklewriter

July 12, 2008

It is, you know. Sometimes, when horrible things happen it’s because amazing things are up ahead. With the life I’ve had for the past couple of years, I’m eminently qualified to say that out loud all day, every day. Believe. And don’t forget to breathe.

I’ll say some prayers that everything at this point is fine. Stress is never a good thing for anyone.

RYN: It’s so good to know your ceiling is tidy. *grin*