August 18, 2009

A confession.

I have a somewhat silly confession to make. I am only afraid of two real things in this world: Clowns and Palmetto bugs. However, I’m deathly afraid of monsters.

Eh? Monsters? You mean horrendous people who do monstrous things? No, I mean monsters. Werewolves, demons, ghosts, Creatures Man Was Not Meant to Know. I’m plagued by nightmares every night–so much in fact that I’ve broken down them into three general categories. Bad Dreams (which include "normal" nightmares such as mutilations and finding dead bodies, etc.), Scary Dreams (which include strange yet non-supernatural happenings such as people vomiting spiders, rats, centipedes, etc.), and true Nightmares (often involving monsters that go on killing sprees).

I’ve been having these vivid nightmares for well over a decade now and sometimes they get so bad I can’t fall back to sleep (I have the annoying tendency to pick up a dream right where I left off in it until it is "finished" unless I am awake for between 2-4 hours before going back to sleep.).

I’m rarely in my nightmares. More often than not I’m like a ghost or camera panning around the action. Often they eventually become lucid but not in the way that I control any character therein but more that I give direction to a character in the dream and guide them from general harm and help them survive.

But this all bleeds into the real world. I wake up–afraid to go to the bathroom to splash water on my face; afraid to go to the kitchen to get a glass of water; or even get out of bed. The half opened closet frightens me, as does the noises the cats make (could be monsters you know).

I know that it’s somewhat silly to be afraid of monsters–seeing as how they aren’t real. But, then there are some people (several) that tell me that they are real and even my scientific mind can and does create ways for them to be real. (Not specifically as such, but rather in round about ways.) I’ve even given up my extreme love of horror movies.

All in all, it’s a horrible thing to be afraid of. A pile of clothes, a coat in a closet, the natural sounds of a house breathing all become things of abject terror in my heart. So it leads to strange sleeping patterns where I nap rather than sleep. Which I know isn’t particularly healthy, but it’s the best I can manage.

In other news I’m still playing KoL. My Seal Clubber is halfway to level 20. Looking for a good, simple, free, d6 based RP game. I love GURPS but it’s a bit too…technical. Anyway, I’m off.

–RK

MissVerbivore

August 19, 2009

Ah, I know how you feel. My dreams–nightmare’s really–are usually graphic and terrifying. I honestly do not how my mind is so… Gorey… RYN: Oh, I plan to. I am actually planning on going to McHolms school of Business

.Tragedy.In.Waiting.

I can’t say that I have had a nightmare in….some 10 or 12 years. I don’t know why. I used to have them all the time. Specifically regarding Michael Jackson’s Thriller movie/video. I used to always get trapped in that house. Anyway, I think more often now, because I understand the way dreams work and the lucidity of them, I can acknowledge that it is a dream and when I wake up I can comeout of it. My room is full of funky looking things in the dark. However…on the other hand…there are things/people that come into my room all the time. Just recently someone was sitting on my computer chair when I popped awake. I guess when “it” realized I was awake, it melted away. I’ve had several instances where there were “people” in bed with me…once this “person” had their arm and leg on top of me and i couldn’t roll over and immediately after that i heard kids laughing. A second time I popped awake suddenly and there was a girl standing right by my bed and she like laid down in bed with me but melted into the bed. None of this ever really “scared” me, it was more like just being startled. lol. Anyway take care. ~♥~

AnAtheistsPhilosophy

I wish I had dreams like that? 🙁 Especially being able to jump back into them like you were talking about.

RYN: I have seen ‘What the Bleep Do We Know?’ All and all it was a pretty good movie. If you liked that then you should read a book called ‘The Black Order’ as well by James Rollins. He did a lot of research for the book and gives a list of books that he either used or recommends if you want to go further into Quantum mechanics.

If you do a little research into Dr. Masaru Emoto. Do not buy snake oil from this guy. His experiments were tested time and time again under controlled conditions and nothing conclusive was ever found. That kind of defeated most of the purpose of that movie for me when I found that out.

Manivasagan

August 20, 2009

ryn : thanks for the note. such a grown up man afraid of monstors ?

Rage_Bites

i have the most messed up dreams…we should hug and snuggle and keep eachother safe… Mhmmm.

La Diosa

August 22, 2009

*found you on random* I am awfully sorry about the terror and fear you have regarding monsters. I certainly hope that Peace and Calm come your way, and allow you to live a beautiful life, without these limitations.

Yeah, your right. It’s just Binx(sister who will be leaving) and I are very close. It will be very different when she is gone.

Thank you, Yeah, hopefully it will change, but due to what Obama–I don’t have too much against him- is doing I am going to be paying through the nose my whole life.

NotKieran

August 23, 2009

I’ve woken up from dreams with the same effect, yes.

August 25, 2009

Good Morning! –Cissy

August 26, 2009

Thanks! I will think of that. The form of the entry? Like thr “who, what, where, and why” thing? Go ahead! –Cissy