filling in the gaps

It is amazing how putting things off for just "one more day" can lead to the space of a few months. Pop always claimed to be the King of Procrastinators . Maybe it is an inherited disorder. I apologize for my neglect.
Lauren graduated college just before Christmas. I am so proud of her. The last few weeks have been spent driving all over town (I do the driving) and going from one doctor/dentist/chiropractor/physical therapy office to another delivering resumes. She has given out over 100 and is feeling major stress. She has had one call back but I am not holding my breath. It wouldn’t have been a good "fit" but at this point she just wants an income.
Michael has moved back in with us. (He is still in the Army Reserves ) This has been a HUGE source of stress for all of us. Michael is sharing a room with Sam which is reason enough to be concerned. The two of them together is a potential catastrophe in the making. Lauren moved out, sort of. She is living in the attic at mama’s house. It is just across the field but I thought it would be a good transition for her so that she is ready to get her own place eventually. Ben got Lauren’s old room. He has worked hard, kept his grades up and has earned the privacy.
Michael’s living conditions were NOT good. Around the beginning of December I discovered that he didn’t have food in the house. Then he informed me that the pipes had frozen and he had no water. When we went to check on repairing the pipes I almost got sick in the yard. The place is a DIVE. I did not go inside. I couldn’t. The place next door was a meth lab before the people were arrested. I am NOT joking. When I had a minute with Michael alone I asked him "Why don’t you just come home?" He seemed relieved. I know I was. The family dynamic has changed and it is a difficult adjustment for us all. He has found a job and starts on Monday. I don’t how long it will last. Michael is already talking about getting an apartment with one of his friends. That is NOT good news. If he does that the job will fall by the wayside. His "friends" are anything but that. All I can do is love him and pray for him. At least when he is here I know that he is warm and safe and actually has access to food. The boy (okay man) has never been big but when he got out of tech school he wore a 32". When he moved home he couldn’t keep a size 30" up on his hips even with a belt.
Christmas was strange. Michael is still stuck between the "frat boy" mentality and realizing that he is essentially a guest in his parent’s home. I don’t want him to be too comfortable (hence why he is sharing a room with his little brother) because I want him to WANT to be responsible for himself. I spend all my time resisting the urge to smack him. Michael spent most of the holidays off with his friends and that got mad because we had went ahead with our tradition of opening gifts on Christmas Eve without him.
Mama (after many questions and much reassurance that it would be okay) went to Ohio for Christmas. Her friend sent her a plane ticket and begged. So mama had her first white Christmas. She had a blast. It was so odd not seeing her on Christmas. I know the holidays are very difficult for her. This was the third one without daddy. Their anniversary was the day after Christmas. Daddy was always the focus of celebrations. He was essentially the biggest kid in the whole family. I still miss him something fierce.
I made the bold declaration that I was NOT having a house full of people for Christmas this year. I was exhausted and in a dark place. I made the drive to my brother’s house and delivered their gifts a few days before Christmas. They were all a bit "pouty" because meemaw had the nerve to leave. Christopher’s birthday was December 28. Lauren told him to suck it up because meemaw had missed her graduation! Apparently kids of all ages know how to pout!
The next day I made the long drive to my sister’s house in Aliceville. The gifts were a big hit. I got lots of hugs, especially from David. My nephew is a wonderful young man. He is about 6’5" and I am intimately acquainted with his rib cage as that is all I ever really see! Whenever he sees me he gets this shy but delighted look on his face and holds his arms out. I wish he lived closer because he never fails to make me feel loved. He graduates high school this year so we got him a very nice dress watch. When I mentioned that he would be dressing up for job interviews and going on more dates I thought my sister would choke me. She declared that David was not going to date because dealing with girls would "ruin him". I guess she would know as she has three daughters. I know she just doesn’t want his heart broken. David is very shy and maybe a bit too trusting. I don’t want his heart broken either. In fact I might just have to hurt the girl that tried!
My husband was a VERY bad man this year. I say that because he spent way too much. The lady at the jewelry store sees him now and yells at him across the mall, "HEY RICKY….." It is kind of scary actually. I got black and white diamonds and a Pandora charm bracelet (he chose an open heart charm, a key (for my daddy) a turtle (for my babies) and a cat charm (for Sebastian) and it is beautiful! He also got me DKNY perfume and a Bose docking station for my IPOD. I also got a NOOK with a purple leather cover. I got a hounds tooth (in honor of Bear Bryant) train case filled with cosmetics and bath products. He spoils me. All of the other women in the family got pearls this year.
It was nice knowing I only had to cook for my immediate family. I do realize that my family is large and that they eat like they can’t remember their last meal but it is easier than cooking for 30! Christmas evening my sister in law mentioned how "down" she was feeling about not seeing family. I casually mentioned "Well come on over" and literally before I could turn around they were at the front door. I think they broke a land speed record getting here! We watched "The Game Changer" (Nick Saban documentary) which is very good. They boys played PS3. It was funny watching Christopher (age 8) go toe to toe with Ben and Michael. Catelyn plopped herself in her Uncle Ricky’s lap and once she had his attention she refused to share it!
We all discussed loading up and driving to my sister’s house as a surprise but we found out that the kids had all gone to the movies in Mississippi. Mama is under strict orders to stay at home next year.
I am still adjusting to the diagnosis I received in November. I have Rheumatoid Arthritis.  I have an appointment with a specialist on February 18. So far it only seems to involve my shoulders and my left arm. It is not incapacitating just annoying and inconvenient at this point. We shall see.
Ben had to get glasses. He was really nervous. His prescription is very low but he needed something to sharpen his vision just a bit. He wanted contacts so we ordered them. Once he actually had to wear them he discovered he did NOT like them. The shocking thing is that he was more nervous about wearing glasses. I know he didn’t want people laughing. I helped him pick out some really nice frames. When he came home with them Lauren was the first one to say, "OH great. I have been getting ready. I had a whole list of insults and now I can’t use them. You actually look really Good. That was a rotten thing to do." When Ben realized that almost every single person he saw on a daily basis thought he looked very cool he told me to cancel the order for the contacts. Silly kid.
Daddy’s birthday was January 8 (just like Elvis) and once again there is a huge hole left. When I was doing genealogy research I came across a women’s will. It was dated late 1800’s, I can’t remember the exact year. She lived across the river down near Pickens County . After stating all of her bequests the estate was divided and dealt with as she wanted. The final part was the bit that captured my attention. It is amazing how much this woman and I have in common. She died 75 years before I was born. "My final request is this: If you want to make me truly happy and know that my soul is at rest, When I die bury me at the feet of my dear Papa." This woman (whose father had been dead for 50 years at the time) still loved and missed her daddy and just wanted to be near him. I can relate.